Unknown Dangerous Desires
by RoisinEden
Summary: HichiIchi. Ichigo returned from Hueco Mundo after beating some weak arrancars. He saved Orihime, and everything was peaceful. But was it really? He and his Hollow start to have strange dreams or so they think. Meanwhile, in Real World evil shadows kill innocent people. In the same time, Shirosaki starts to act strange. Why? Does he want to mock the teen or is it something more...?
1. Chapter 0

**Ch.0**

**It's only the beginning...**

That day the sky wasn't perfectly clear as some clouds were wandering on the blue sky. They had a grey shade, but it didn't seem to be threatening.

It was a nice morning; the wind was blowing gently, carrying with it some white and pink petals along the city.

The boy was staying in his bed looking at the clouds. It was quiet, _very_ quite. The sunlight was flooding the window, but its light seemed, somehow...hmmm...unreal.

He was bored since he had nothing to do. It was Saturday, so he had no school and he had done his homework the day before. Karin, Yuzu and his idiotic father went to the Mall to buy some clothes. 'I should have gone with them' he thought and then he sighed. Rukia left the Real World to visit her brother and Kon and Ririn went to Urahara's shop, most probably to piss that guy off, but knowing Urahara, he would piss them off instead.

Even in his head was quiet. He didn't see his Hollow since Ichigo defeated him. "Why isn't he here trying to scare the crap out off me as he always did before? Well, I'm sure he didn't disappear because I use his powers sometimes, but why is he so damn quiet? No matter how I look at it it's suspicious." Ichigo thought and sighed again.

He closed his eyes weariy. A lot has happened recently. He met the Vizards and they helped him to rule his Hollow. Then Orihime was kidnapped by the Arrancars so he went to Hueco Mundo to take her back. He and his friends managed to get her back and now he could live his life peacefully. But could he?

He didn't need peace although he did not realize that. He didn't realize that he wanted to fight either. Deep down in his soul was I imprisoned that desire to kill everyone. That chain that tied his dark and insane desires started to weaken. And all these things happened inside him and he didn't even know.

"_**I'm bored, King! Too peacefully…an' ya feel da same." **_a hoarse voice said in his head.

Ichigo opened his eyes surprised and his Hollow started to smirk at his King.

"_**Didja think ya got rid off me?" **_the Hollow said with his hoarse voice then it started to laugh hysterically as he always did. _**"Nu-uh. Don't try ta deceive yerself… Ya'll never get rid off meh. Ya CAN'T get rid off me." **_it said.

"Go away!" Ichigo said firmly.

"_**As ya wish" **_the Hollow said and smirked slyly before he vanished in darkness.

Ichigo sighed again.

"So the idiot did not disappear…but I already knew that." said the orangette being sad.

He didn't like his Hollow because that guy...thing or whatever he or it was, always tried to mock the orangette. The thing was a parasite which must be destroyed.

Ichigo looked at the sky again and then he observed that the sky was cloudy. As he lay in his bed he fell asleep having a strange dream…


	2. Chapter 1

**Ch. 1**

**Lightless**

It was dark, so dark that he couldn't see his palms staying in front of his face. At first he couldn't hear anything so he was completely sunk in darkness, swallowed by it. Then he started to hear someone walking. It was a monotonous sound that could be heard coming from far away, but the person wasn't advancing at all, an impossible thing after all.

Then the person stopped walking, but the teen listened carefully. And, indeed, the person started to walk again, but now, the teen was sure that the noise was coming from behind. As he listened he could hear a creepy xylophone song.

The teen gazed in darkness. He couldn't see anything and he was feeling as if he were in a forbidden place. Then he heard the being coming closer. The person...being... or whatever he/she/it was coming towards him. The teen froze. He could hear the steps coming closer...and closer...but he couldn't move. Even if he could, there was no escaping since he was sunk in darkness.

The being was coming closer, and the teen could hear it laughing devilishly.

***TAP*** closer. ***TAP-TAP* **more closer. ***TAP-TAP-TAP* **now only 7 meters separate those two. The being stopped laughing and walking.

The teen could see a dense fog coming from behind, a strange thing since it was so dark.

***TAP-TAP***it started again. ***TAP-TAP-TAP-TAP*** very close. The being was so close that the teen could hear its' calm breath. It snorted then it laughed hysterically.

"**My, my...I never thought ya'll come here!"** it said with a satisfied voice.

The teen narrowed his eyes while trying to look at the being, but it was too dark.

"**Gomen, gomen! I've forgotten tha' ya can't see in da dark." **the being clapped its hands and a small white candle was burning with a strange white flame.

The being seemed to be a teenager, with pale skin and black nails. He couldn't see that guys' face though..but he was wearing something white.

"**This is yers."**the pale one said pointing at the other teen with the candle. Welcome to Mashiro, King!'/strong the pale one continued with a satisfied voice while turning his back on the confused teen.

Ichigo almost dropped the candle. The being wasn't a teenager, but his idiotic Hollow. The orangette didn't move. Seeing this, the Hollow looked at him grinning.

"**Scared, King?"**

Ichigo shook his head in disapproval. He wasn't scared but rather angry. He would like to kick the Hollow's ass.

"**Nu-uh, King. We won't fight. Not if ya know what's better fer ya. Ya see"** ,it started,**"this" **it said pointing at the place they were**"is** _**MY**_** territory.** **Follow me, I'll show ya aroun'!"** it said and the hollow grinned satisfied.

"NEVER! I won't follow you, you parasite!" Ichigo shouted with hatred and the dark world started to vanish and so his hollow.

But before it disappeared Ichigo saw his Hollow expression. It didn't smirk;actually it was very sad, somehow disappointed. Then Ichigo woke up.

He was in his room, staying in bed.

***ICHIGO'S POV.***

My head was spinning. This time the idiot really caught me. It wasn't a dream. I somehow entered his world.

I looked again at the gray sky as if I tried to find an answer there. There are so many questions. For example why didn't he attack me? Or why was I there?

My thoughts were interrupted when I heard noises coming from downstairs. Karin, Yuzu and my dad were home. I went downstairs where I found Yuzu smiling innocently at me. I wanted to pat her head but I was interrupted by my father. I had to step back to dodge his punch.

"Well done, son!" he said proudly.

"Tch" was my response while I rolled my eyes. He was always like this.

"Oh, no! My dear Masaki, our son is cold with me again. What should I do?", dad said to the big poster of my mother.

"Do you like my new dress?" Yuzu asked me smiling.

She was holding a white dress, with short bouffant sleeves. It had a strawberry-dotted ribbon.

"It's very cute." I said gently.

And I wasn't lying. She probably thought about me when she bought it and after a few minutes she said she remembered her of me.

"I hope I didn't…" said she a bit panicked.

"Of course not. Coming from you makes it adorable, actually."

Yuzu relaxed and then she left to prepare the lunch. I wanted to go and watch TV in the living room, but I was interrupted when I heard faint noises coming from my room. I ran upstairs and found Byakuya sitting at my desk.

"Byakuya...", I started surprised, he would never visit me if there wasn't something very important.

"It's Kuchiki Byakuya for you", he interrupted me with his well-known calm voice.

"What are you doing here?" I said curiously.

'I have come to take you to Soul Society.' he answered bluntly. I can't let you and your friends here. Since the incident with Orihime it's better if we do this." Byakuya said with an icy voice.

"I see" I replied. "Then why don't we go already?"

He widened his eyes in surprise for only one second, then he nodded and opened the gate. I transformed in the soul form and put Kon in my body then left. I was a bit sad since I wanted to stay just a little longer home, but there was no other way.

***REGULAR POV***

The teen was sitting under a tree. He was half asleep. Ichigo was in Soul Society for six days already and he trained every day. Now he was tired so he hid himself under a tree. The wind was blowing gentle, the sun was flooding the green clearing and the sky was blue. No clouds. He could hear a song, coming from far away, a birds' one. It was very peacefully. The teen enjoyed it or at least he should. But could he? He couldn't. Something was missing. But he didn't know what. The answer seemed so close, yet so far away. He closed his eyes as if he could find an answer this way. Even inside was peaceful. That guy wasn't there. 'That parasite...' he started to think then he suddenly stopped. He wasn't sure why he did, though. There were so many questions. For example, why had the hollow that disappointed look, or who was that guy, anyway? He called him a parasite all the time, but now he felt troubled. The orangette started to ask himself if that guy was a parasite. Even the answers for this questions seemed so close...but they wouldn't come to the surface.

He fell asleep and found himself in his inner world near Zangetsu.

"Is there something wrong, Ichigo?" the Zanpakutou asked with a worried voice.

"I don't know", the teen replied truthfully. He realized he didn't know what to ask. What should he ask? Should he ask if the hollow was actually an angel, or if the parasite could be trusted? I had no sense. "Old man Zangetsu, do you, by any chance, know what's that guy doing?" he asked in the end.

"You mean, Hichigo?" Zangetsu said with a surprised voice. "He's probably sleeping, who knows."

"By Hichigo you mean..." Ichigo said confused.

"The Hollow" Zangetsu said.

"He said he had no name" the teen grumbled troubled.

"Well, that's true. So since he was nameless I gave him one. But I must warn you. He hates it. The name is an abbreviation from Hollow Ichigo. I guess it hurts his ego." Zangestu explained.

"So it has an ego, huh. You call it "him"...What is that guy, actually?" Ichigo asked full of curiosity.

"I'm sorry, Ichigo. I'm afraid I can't tell you. He would be very mad...and actually this is something you have to discover yourself. I don't like to see you troubled, but it can't be helped."

The teen went silent. That made the question even more unbearable. He wanted to know, he knew the answer, but it wouldn't come to surface. How stubborn. How annoying. The orangette fell asleep.

**"Idiot"**,a hoarse voice said somewhere near him. **"Ya try too much...Yer so innocent, but maybe that's why I..."** the person said being so close to the orangette.

The teen felt someone stroking his hair, but he couldn't wake up. Then he felt someone giving him a warm faint kiss on his forehead. Ichigo opened his eyes suddenly, searching for the person, but there wasn't anyone. He touched his forehead gently with his fingers as if the kiss could fade away if he pressed more. He probably blushed. It wasn't a big deal a kiss on the forehead, but this felt so lovely. The orangette continued to stay under the tree, but his mind was blank...


	3. Chapter 2

**Ch. 2**

**Silver, Blood and Shadows**

A faint silver light entered the hole called window. He was lying on his bed being covered by a silky white sheet. He stood up and stared through the window shocked. A black and white world showed before him. The white sand dunes were as still as always, and the sky was pitch black, without any clouds. But what shocked him wasn't the solitary place where he was born. It was the moon existence that startled him, its light .There was light! The moon was in the waxing crescent phase, its glow stroking the sand dunes blankly. It was staying there, on the pitch black sky, with a boldly and defiant attitude, like an ice queen. The moon was piercing through his dark world, making him feel a bit empty inside.

His dirty dark world was exposed, even if the light wasn't very bright. He felt exposed to its light, after all he was a monster. All he wanted was to slaughter, to see blood and corpses everywhere. He wanted to destroy everything in a violent way. That light exposed his dark heart so much. And how he hated it! Why would he need light when he can have darkness instead? If there was no light he could do whatever he wanted without any care. But now, everything was ruined, wasn't it?

But as much as he hated it, he loved it. He was afraid of it, but maybe that's why he felt attracted to it so much. There wasn't a big deal, after all. He was who he was. He couldn't deny it. But that wasn't the real reason. He realized what happened in the end. He has fallen from his hell, his monstrous being started to feel. He had feelings! No wonder he kissed that person. But didn't he already know that? Why was he so afraid of admitting it? His heart throbbed painfully in his chest. He wouldn't be accepted, of course, after all he was a monster. That amplified the pain in his chest. He was so close to that person, yet so far away.

**"Tha' guy would kill meh if he discovers."** the Hollow wailed with a miserable and desperate voice. **"Notta mention I almost got discovered**, **actually. If he...No. I hafta keep 't a secret**!" he concluded with a serious voice. **"If he founds out I've fallen fer 'im...tha' would be mah end." **He sighed.

He wasn't sure whether it was love or something else, but whatever it was it had to remain a secret. Until when? The answer was obvious, of course. He had to keep it a secret until he died and, who knows, maybe even after his death.

Hichigo sighed again and kept looking at the black sky. He felt so empty, so lonely, and so hopeless. He knew these feelings' names but he never experienced them before. He felt Ichigos' sadness a few times before. But that was nothing compared to how he was feeling right now. Hichigo was feeling so sorrowful, so wretched when he thought that Ichigo would never look at him properly, that Ichigo would never accept him, that the teen will see him as a parasite for the rest of his life, that he was going to die alone with his feelings buried deep down in him.

**"Those feelings would never be reached by the light. The only thing he will see will be my monstrosity, nothing else."** he said firmly and he threw himself in his fluffy bed. White feathers begun to float in the air and then they slowly fall back.

Hichigo caught one of them in his hand. His face was serious and his eyes were filled with a dark sadness. He thought that the feather was so strong when a bird was flying but it was so fragile staying in his hand. It remembered him of Ichigo. **"So strong, yet so fragile..."**Hichigo closed his eyes...he felt so tired.

Ichigo was training with Renji in Soul Society, when a Hell Butterfly came to him.

He was told that he had to go and talk to Kuchiki-taichou. The Substitute Shinigami wiped his forehead and smiled at Renji.

"We will continue this later." the teen said and the red-haired nodded.

Ichigo used shunpo to arrive to Byakuya's desk. The raven haired taichou was writing something when Ichigo entered the room.

"You called" the teen said.

'Yes, I did.' Byakuya answered even though Ichigo didn't address him any question. "You'll go back in the Real World. We think you are strong enough to stay there without getting kidnapped. Not that I'm insulting your friends. But you are as strong as a taichou, and with the mask you have even more power. I hope you understand." Kuchiki Byakuya said calmly.

"I'm not stupid." Ichigo murmured and for a few seconds the raven haired frowned at the teen then he went back at his normal look.

"You'll leave in 30 minutes. Any questions?" Byakuya said.

"Yes…Will I leave alone?" Ichigo tried to use a calm voice as Byakuya did, but he failed, he was curious.

"Yes, because Karakura Town already has Urahara and Yoruichi so there's no need for other Shinigami to go there."

Ichigo nodded then left Byakuyas' desk and went to see Rukia. He found her under the tree that he rested a week ago. He remembered about the kiss and blushed.

"Ichigo" the raven haired girl said a bit surprised. "What's wrong?" she asked trying to hide the curiosity that filled her purple eyes.

"N-nothing" he said with a low voice. He wasn't sure whether he was alright or not. "I will leave in 30 minutes. They are sending me back." he said trying not to think about that kiss.

"Yeah, I heard." the midget said with a disappointed look. 'But that's not what's puzzling you, right?" she added with a strange voice. "You are acting strange since a week ago or something like this. Tell me…what happened?" the tiny girl said firmly.

Ichigo looked at her troubled. He didn't know whether to tell her or not. It wasn't a big deal, for God's sake!

"It's nothing" he said after a few minutes, after all he couldn't tell her.

Rukia shook her head in disapproval. Of course she didn't buy his lies, now...who would anyway? She knew he was hiding something important. She saw him blushing very often while he stared at the sky. "He must be in love" she thought. "But with who?"

"Ichigo, by any chance, are you in love?" she asked leisurely with a big grin on her face. Ichigo widened his eyes; he wasn't in love, right? Well, there's no one who would fall just because they were kissed on the forehead while they were sleeping. No he wasn't in love, but he had the impression that the doer liked him. He didn't know why, though.

"No." he said bluntly and he wasn't lying. "It's just..." he started being uncertain of what he wanted to say so he rephrased. "I think someone likes me, but I don't know who she or he is. I was kissed while I was sleeping under this tree" he said pointing at the tree.

"She or he?" Rukia asked shocked. "Why would a GUY kiss you? Ichigo, by any chance, are you gay? Or at least bi?" she asked with the same shocked voice.

"No. It's just that I felt a faint men's perfume." he explained amused.

"Ah, I see. Well, even if you were gay or bi, it wouldn't be a problem. I mean I wouldn't leave you." she said a bit panicked.

"I know, Rukia." he said gently, he was trusting her. "Well, it wasn't a big deal, she or he kissed me on my forehead, but I can't get rid of this impression. Maybe I'm too proud of myself, who knows?" he said troubled.

"Who knows, but I tempted to think like you. I don't know why. I guess it's instinct. Well, you should wait for the second attack. Anyway, relax. You will solve it. I know you do." she advised him and he felt a bit released from those puzzling thoughts. She was right. Let the time resolve the problem.

"Thank you, Rukia!" he said giving her a big smile then he left for her luck. She was blushing violently and yes, she liked him. She didn't like the story about the kiss. That person ran away before Ichigo could see him or her. That strengthen his hypothesis about the person being a guy. Maybe the guy was embarrassed. But even a girl gets embarrassed. Still, she felt something wrong about it. Now she understood how the teen felt in the past week. They both had a bad feeling about it, more or less.

Ichigo was sitting on a bench, looking at the clouds. It was so peaceful that it seemed unreal. The sun was shining bright, the wind wasn't blowing at all. The park was filled with happy people. In short, it was a perfect spring day.

Even so, he felt uneasy. Something was wrong. Everything was so peaceful, it looked like the tranquil before the storm. He moved his gaze from the sky to look at the living fence in front of him. He stared at it for a long time. He wasn't sure but a strange reiatsu came from it. The teen felt it at a low rate but there was power behind it. Probably the person tried to hide himself, but he or she wasn't too successful. He stood up and went about 2 meters when he saw the living fence moving. All he could see was a shadow, a pure shadow, and it was a guys' one. The teen stopped and so did the shadow. He stared at it and the shadow seemed to do that as well. Now that was too much! The orangette moved forward closing little by little the gap between him and that guy. It didn't move at first, and then it vanished.

"What the..." Ichigo murmured shocked when it disappeared. He was sure he saw right. Well, when you don't know something, the only thing you can do is to go to Urahara.

The teen left the park. He was walking calmly, but his senses were vigilant. There was nothing wrong no matter where he looked. Or at least that's what he thought. The shadow was in a cafe, but Ichigo didn't notice it. The shadow smirked devilishly while drinking his coffee. Maybe it was the time for him to show in his real form. Another shadow approached him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"**Not now"** a calm voice said.

"**Tch"** the other replied and both vanished.

"Shadows you say…" Urahara said thoughtful then he take another bite from his pizza. "Well this is something I never heard about." he said with a serious look on his face. "I will investigate it, so you have to be very vigilant." he ended and Ichigo nodded since his mouth was full of pizza.

After they ate Ichigo stood up and said that he has to go home. Urahara nodded and the teen left. On his way back he didn't sense anything strange and when he arrived home he went straight to his room. He searched for the strange reiatsu but he didn't feel anything. He sighed relieved, but it was too early. On his pillow there was laying a sheet of black paper. The teen stared at it for a few minutes then he approached. Ichigo discovered, for his terror, blood on the floor. A lot of blood. He widened his eyes in shock. He sniffed it but he didn't know whose blood was. He turned and looked at the black ticket. With trembling fingers he took the ticket. Then he turned on the light and started to read the ticket.

"_**Like what you see? Well, it doesn't matter if you like it or not. You are lucky this time it wasn't someone you knew. Beware of the livin fences. You never know what might come up from them"**_

He stuffed the ticket in his pocket, and then he cleaned the blood. He threw himself in bed and it took a long time until he fell asleep. The situation begun to stink. When he fell asleep he found himself in a place that looked like Hueco Mundo, but it wasn't Hueco Mundo and it was obvious.

The teen was covered by a silky white sheet and he was lying in a fluffy bed. Next to him, for his surprise, was sleeping his hollow. Why…?


	4. Chapter 3

**Ch. 3**

**Guilty Passion**

Silky white sheet. White feathers. Fluffy bed. The moonlight entering the window. White walls. And next to him...a shirtless albino sleeping soundless while hugging one big white pillow.

His eyes widened. Why was he there? And where was he? He looked through the window. The sky was pitch black, the white sand dunes where unmoved since there was no wind. It looked like Hueco Mundo, but was he really in Hueco Mundo? Probably not.

The orangette turned his gaze on the sleeping guy face. His skin was pale and it seemed even whiter because of the moonlight that entered through the big window. A nice breeze started to blow, rumpling gently his white hair. Ichigo reached out for the albino's face but he stopped before his fingers touched the pale skin. "What am I doing?" the orangette thought.

The truth was that he never looked at the albino properly. Every time they met each other they fought, but now the story was different. The teen thought that the hollow was actually cute now that he was sleeping. He realized that he wanted to touch that pale skin, and he blushed. What was he thinking? That guy was the enemy, that guy wanted him dead. But the orangette couldn't help himself. He was as curious as a new born. "What if he wakes up?" he suddenly thought and stopped his hand again. Well, that would be a problem, of course.

But could he control himself? All he could think about was the albino and his pale skin. He pressed his fingers gently on the albino's face as if he were afraid that the guy would break if he touched harder. The hollow's skin was unexpectedly smooth. Ichigo was now touching the pale cheek with his palm. Hichigo had a cold skin and that made the teen want to touch it more. He wanted to warm up that cold skin, to remove the loneliness that the albino emanated. "Do hollows have feelings? Can they feel something besides the desire to kill?" Ichigo asked himself. Well, he thought that guy was a parasite, but was he really? The hollow denied that. Zangetsu told so too. But then what was he? Who was he? When he talked with Zangetsu the Old man called the albino a "he". Was he a person? It seemed to be so. Then why was he in his head?

Too many questions. Ichigo removed his doubts from his mind. Did it matter who he was? It did, but Ichigo didn't care anymore. He sat up and then he leant over the sleeping albino without removing his palm. He could feel his faint perfume and it seemed very familiar but he couldn't recall where he met it. "So hollows do perfume theirselfs." the teen thought a bit amused.

The teens' face was so close to the others' face that he could kiss him if he wanted to. The teen blushed violently when he realized what he was doing. "What the hell's wrong with me?" he thought and backed away from the white guy putting a hand at his mouth. His eyes widened in surprise and terror and his face was burning. Then he realized he was shirtless too. "What the hell is happening here?" he thought. "Why am I in the same bed as him and what's wrong with me?" he continued in his mind. He sighed and then he tried to stand up but a strong invisible hand grab his arm pulling him back. It wasn't Hichigo, he didn't move. The teen didn't oppose and the invisible hand left him alone. He was trapped there.

The orangette was starring at the ceiling then he turned his gaze at the sleeping hollow. Hichigo didn't move at all, he didn't even sense the teen fingers that pressed his pale cheek again. His face was serious, but it expressed loneliness. Maybe his hollow wasn't that bad. Maybe he felt guilty for his behavior, who knows? The teens' fingers were drawing circles on the pale skin again, going down now touching the pale neck. And they stopped there. He could feel the hollows' pulse. He drew himself closer to the sleeping hollow. Now only 10 centimeters separate their bodies. He blushed violently as he was getting closer to Hichigo. He wanted to kiss him. A part of him was shouting to fuck the rationality and do it, another one was begging to run away. He thought he was crazy, but that made him feel morbidly satisfied. He put his hand on the albinos' backhead and as he got closer. Now only 5 centimeters separate their lips. He stopped. No, he had to stop. What if the hollow woke up? The albino would definitely kill him. But he didn't care. He wanted something and he was going to take it. What was wrong with that?

He pressed his lips against the Hichigos' lips. Now his fingers were stroking the albino's hair. What he felt was lust. He was curious about the enemy, that's what the teen believed. But he realized he wanted more. How selfish of him! He licked the albinos' lips and then pressed then again more violently than before. And for his surprise Hichigo moaned softly and let Ichigo's tongue slip in his mouth. The hollow didn't seem to be awaken, but even if he woke up, Ichigo wouldn't stop. The teen moved his hand on the white back, pulling the sleeping hollow closer to his bare chest as their tongues fought violently. He could feel the hollow's pulse accelerating. He stopped realizing what he was doing. He backed off, blushing violently.

Ichigo opened his eyes and looked around panting. It was only a dream. He sighed relieved. '"Only a dream, only a dream" he repeated to himself over and over again trying to calm down. "Damn. That was only dream, but it seemed so real! What the hell was I doing? Kissing a hollow? What a nightmare!" he thought. The orangette sighed again and turned his gaze at the ceiling. He was too confused to think anymore.

Kurosaki Ichigo was staring through the window while the teacher was talking about some complicated stuff. He was tired as he didn't get any sleep the previous night, well if you don't count the perverted dream, ahem, nightmare. He sighed and kept looking through the window. Why would he dream something like that? Was he nuts? Well, a normal person wouldn't dream about kissing a hollow for sure. So yes, he was. He sighed again. What if he didn't stop? What would have he done? He didn't want to know the answer. He sighed again.

"Ouch!" he shouted after being kicked by his teacher. "I didn't do anything!"

"That's not true. You sighed over twenty times in only one hour. You are depressing everyone here. What's wrong with you?" the teacher said worried.

"Nothing. I'm sorry. I-I think I need.. to take a break." the teen said and the teacher nodded.

Ichigo left the class and went home. There was no one there and it was so silent. Maybe he could get some sleep. He threw himself in bed. But he didn't get the chance to sleep since his badge started to ring. He transformed in his soul form and left the house. It seemed that no one was going to let him rest, not even a bit.

He found the Hollow fast since the monster wasn't too far from his home. It was a weak hollow and he felt disgusted. To think that he kissed a hollow!

"**Kill me, Shinigami. Please. Kill me before they come."** the hollow said with a voice full of despair.

"Are you making fun of me?" Ichigo said irritated.

" **No, I ain't. Please, do it before they come. They will devour me"** it said even more desperate.

"Who will eat you?" Ichigo said surprised.

"**I don't know who they are. But please. Kill me NOW!"**

Ichigo killed him since he couldn't discover anything from the weakling. This was strange. Someone ate the hollows, no wonder they were so hard to find since a while ago. He had to pay another visit to Uraharas' Shop and he didn't really like the idea, but he shunpoed there.

A few minutes later Urahara was listening at the teen.

"This is strange. You say it begged you to kill him. It was hunted by someone else and they weren't shinigami." Urahara said full of thought.

"Yes. And yesterday I found a ticket on my pillow. Not to mention blood on the floor." the teen remembered and he gave Kisuke the ticket he brought with him without knowing why.

"I think the shadow is responsible for this. Although, I don't really know what's happening. Kurosaki-san, you look awful. Did you sleep last night?" Urahara said really worried.

"Not really." Ichigo said without looking at Kisuke who started to grin devilishly at him. He for sure was thinking about some perverted stuff.

"Ne, Kurosaki-san, did something happen last night? Like some pervy hollow visiting you or stuff?" Kisuke said grinning. "You don't have to be ashamed, you know. You are young, after all." Kisuke continued.

Ichigo's face turned bright red and he remembered again about the previous night. No, he didn't sleep at all, and yes, he had been visited by a hollow, or to be honest, he visited the hollow and he was pervy. But Urahara will never learn that.

"O-of course not!" Ichigo said. "It's just that…I thought about the shadow…and about the ticket. That's all." Ichigo lied and Kisuke stopped grinning.

"Ah, I see." Urahara said. "Then I guess I will call Yoruichi to talk to her and we will meet again tomorrow.'" Urahara said.

Ichigo nodded and disappeared.

He woke up and looked around panting. There was no one in his room. He threw himself back in the bed disappointed, making a few white feathers float. He touched his lips with a trembling hand. He could swear that he felt someone kissing him, yet there was no one around. He thought HE touched his cheek, that HE touched his backhead, that HE stroke his hair, that HIS hand pulled him closer to HIS chest, that HE pressed HIS lips against his, that THEIR tongues fought furiously, but HE wasn't there, now would he?

"**`f course he ain't here, moron!"**the hollow wailed. **"I think I'm ta** ** ya, Ichigo! It's all yer fault!"** he said blushing violently while he pronounced the teen's name. **"Now I can't even say his name.** **Perfect. I dunno how will I keep 't a secret 'rom I-know-who."** he sighed.

His dream seemed so real that he almost felt those warm touches. This was frustrating. He knew very well that He-knows-who would never do those things, yet he couldn't stop himself dreaming about them.

"**Only a dream, only a dream" **he repeated to himself over and over again and he fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 4

**Ch. 4**

**Strangers**

That was another sunny day, without any clouds, with a faint wind blowing sometimes. He was on his way to school sighing over and over again. His life got tangled in the past months. He met Rukia, a Shinigami, and then he became one. He and his friends fought against Seireitei to bring Rukia back and he did it. Not alone, they did it. But he started to chase after her, and no matter how strong his opponent was he stood up and fought. Then he had to fight his Hollow who wanted him dead. He became a Vizard, even though he'll never truly admit it. And after that the Arrancar started to cause them problems. They captured Inoue and he decided to bring her back. He went to Hueco Mundo and fought some Arrancars, some Menos, but they weren't too powerful. They all knew it was a trap. Maybe Inoue wasn't the same anymore. Who knows what those guys did to her until he got her back. But he couldn't let her there. He was who he was.

For others spring was something relaxing, but for him wasn't like that. Not anymore. In winter they were going to fight Aizen and his Arrancars. Time was passing too fast. Everything was changing. It saddened him a bit even if he wasn't that type of person who was afraid of change. No matter how much confidence he had, there was also the fear that they won't be able to stop Aizen.

He shook his head in disapproval. He had no time to feel useless fear. They were going to win, no matter what. That was all. Nothing more. They will protect Karakura Town and Soul Society. There was no time for questions full of doubt or fear.

Ichigo arrived at school and he went relaxed to his classroom. He sat down and looked in class with a sad face. He missed his friends. Of course there was Tatsuki-san, Asano and Mizuiro, but they had no idea about the whole Soul Society problem, a good think somehow. Not that he really hated that he became a Shinigami and such; someone had to protect the world. But it was a good thing for them that they were clueless. And a heartbreaking thing was that he had to make them hate him. They started to ask questions when they saw that Inoue disappeared, but he shut them up. He acted miserably towards them, but they gave up. It was better for them this way, even if he was broken inside. Now they won't get hurt because of him anymore.

The teacher entered the classroom after the bell rang and everyone went silent.

"Starting today we have a new student. Come, please!" she said smiling and turning her gaze to the opened door.

Ichigo didn't pay attention, anyway. He was sunk in his thoughts. The teen didn't even bother to move his gaze from the window.

"My name is Tsukiyomi Aoi, pleased to meet you all!" a girl said, but Ichigo wasn't interested. The last thing he would care was transfer students.

"Nice name, Tsukiyomi-san. Now, how about you stay near our bored and depressed Kurosaki-san who doesn't even bother to pay attention to classes lately? I'm sorry I have to put you near a depressing person but it's the last available place we have. Kurosaki-san is the orangette" the teacher said using a full of sarcasm voice.

But Ichigo didn't look at her. He didn't feel like being nice to some new person. He just wanted to sleep because last night he barely slept. Not to mention that two nights ago he had that nightmare about him kissing his hollow and after that he couldn't sleep anymore. A normal reaction, after all. So no, he didn't give a shit about school, and he was probably going to go home the next hour.

The girl sat down and turned her gaze to Ichigo then she said:

"You really are no fun. What a shame!" she said and kept staring at him.

The teen finally turned to look at her. She had a pale skin, but not like his Hollow, anyway, she looked human. Her eyes were azure, and her hair a bit longer than Rukias' and she was slim but she had breasts, not like Inoues' but she had. She was something.

"Sorry." the orangette said closing his eyes tired then he opened them. 'I don't feel well', he said sighing. "I am Kurosaki Ichigo. Nice to meet you." he said that out of formality, but he didn't even try to mask it.

"Well, Ichigo, I'm sorry you don't feel well. Maybe you should go to the infirmary or home. You better tell sensei. If you want I'll tell her." she said with a worried voice.

"No. It's ok. It's just I couldn't sleep in the past nights. That's all." he said giving her a small smile and then he fainted.

When he opened his eyes the infirmary was empty. He jumped out of the bed and walked to his classroom. The teen felt really good, now that he had slept. It seemed that he fainted while talking to the new girl. He wondered who did carry him to the infirmary. He shrugged and continued walking. At least this time he didn't dream anything weird.

But when he entered in the classroom he had his surprise. A raven haired girl was sitting on the desk staring through the window. At first he thought she was Rukia, but then he remembered about the new girl. What was her name? Well, he couldn't recall it.

She turned her gaze from the window and looked at the perplexed teen.

"You are finally awake. You really were tired, weren't you?" she said smiling.

"What are you doing here?" the teen asked ignoring her question.

"Ain't it obvious? I'm waiting for you. I mean, I want you to show me around." she said grinning wild at him.

Ichigo's eyes widened in surprise hearing the girls' proposal. She wanted him to show the town? That's insane. The sun was setting and the town was pretty big. But he didn't refuse. He couldn't. The girl was pretty, although he wasn't interested, and she waited for him. He couldn't let her go home.

He nodded and went to take his things. They left together.

"Are you new here?" he said without realizing it.

"Yeah. I've just moved. I'm coming from Spain, but I'm Japanese. I guess you are from here, though. Right?" she said looking at him full of curiosity.

He nodded then they started to talk about trivial things as they passed the streets. They were taking a random route and they didn't even care. They were absorbed by their little chat. It was relaxing, talking trivial things with human people. He didn't even realize how much he missed it until that day. The teen was happy he met the raven haired girl.

But not everyone was happy about it. Especially a certain person.

***Meanwhile in Mashiro* **

"**That bitch!"** he shouted annoyed. **"She's flirtin' with my King!** _**MY**_** King. And moreover he likes it. Goddammit! I'm goin' ta friggin' kill her."** he continued walking in circles in his white room. **"He's MINE,** **bitch! I said he's MINE".** **And no one touches him while I'm** **aroun'. 'N' belive me, I'm always aroun' him. Always."** he continued his monologue in a hysterical manner.

No matter how much he wanted to keep his feelings a secret from his king he just couldn't accept that the new girl was going to take him under his nose. Like hell he would let that happen. He'll kill her for sure. Soon enough. Soon enough. He would take over the teen's body and kill her. The albino started to laugh hysterically. He'll show her what happens when someone touched what was _**HIS.**_

***Back to Real World, where there was no psychotic albino.***

Ichigo was in his room staring at the ceiling when he heard someone walking on the rooftop. But he didn't have to wake from his comfortable bed, because the person entered through the window. The lights were turned off since he tried to sleep, so he couldn't see much. It was a male's silhouette. His eyes widened in shock when he realized how much he resembled the shadow he saw in the park. Holy shit! This was bad.

The shadow sat down near the teen. Ichigo jumped out of the bed with the intention to turn the lights on but the shadow grabbed his wrists and put him down before the orangette could even move.

"**Don't move. Don't try to call for help. Don't even think about lifting a finger. I tell you. It's useless. You'll come with me. That's all you need to know. That's all you need to have in your worthless mind."** the shadow said.

"**Like hell I will!"** the teen said trying to free his wrists but in vain.

The shadow was staying above him, squeezing harder the teen's wrists.

"**Don't make me repeat myself twice. You'll come. It's simple. You just have to quit on your useless whishes and come."** he said near the teens' ear.

Ichigo didn't say anything, an abnormal thing for him. But the situation was weird. In his thoughts that was what a normal human called rape, but for him it wasn't like that. That guy or whatever it was wanted him to abandon his duties. He wanted too much. But before he could say anything the shadow vanished and let another ticket behind.

_**You better change your mind. Who knows what might happen to your beloved.**_

Ichigo threw the ticket on the floor and he covered himself with his blue blanket. He had enough. He wanted to sleep.

He was sunk in darkness. He could hear someone whistling in front of him, but he didn't move. There was no point in doing that anyway. The person was coming to him. All he had to do was to stay calm and wait. But it didn't go as easy as he wanted to. The person stopped walking and whistling making the teen lose the person's trace.

It didn't pass long until the person started to whistle again. But this time he or she was whistling gently in the teen's ear. Cold fingers touched his skin, making the teen shudder. The person stopped whistling and licked the Ichigo's neck, while the person's hand was holding the teens' neck on the other side. The teen moaned as the person bit his neck, sinking his teeth on the teens' neck and making his blood drip on the his chest. A loud moan escaped Ichigo's mouth as the cold tongue was licking his burning wound. Ichigo didn't want to protest even though a part of him was shouting desperately at him to run away, but there was no escape. He liked the feeling, no matter how weird it was. The person toss him on a wall, or so he thought, and closed the gap between their bodies by pressing his chest with his chest. Yes, the person was a guy, but Ichigo didn't care. Did the gender matter when he felt so good? Of course not.

The stranger pressed his lips fiercely against his and searched for an opening to the teen's mouth with his tongue. He didn't have to wait long. The teen opened his mouth quickly and let the cold tongue slip in his mouth. The stranger was pulling Ichigo's hair violently with one hand, and with another one was squeezing the teen's wrist nailing it on the wall. Their tongues were fighting furiously and the teen seemed to recognize the feeling, but he couldn't recall. Ichigo was sinking his nails on the cold back as they were falling down. His heart was racing madly and he breathed hard. They both did. Lying on the cold floor he was pressed by a cold body, sunk in darkness, being kissed by a stranger. Such a perverted situation!

But they were interrupted when an annoying light entered their little dirty world, vanishing it before they could see each other.

It was morning and that was another perverted dream…


	6. Chapter 5

**Ch. 5****  
Unable**

The warm and fluffy blanket wasn't covering him anymore so the sunlight disturbed his sleep. He woke up, growled and looked around. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw Urahara looking at him with a creepy smirk on his face. The teen didn't want to know what that guy was thinking.

"Are you alright?" Kisuke asked smiling at the confused teen. "You know, it's not healthy for you to sleep with your face covered with a blanket." he added with a worried voice.

Ichigo yawned and scratched his head then he said with a grumpy voice that he was fine. He threw himself in bed and pulled the blanket back. For God's sake, he just wanted to sleep! What was so hard to understand?  
But Urahara didn't leave him alone.

"Ne, Kurosaki-san, was I interrupting something? Like some perverted dream..? I'm sorry if I did interrupt you." Kisuke teased Ichigo who was blushing hard under the blanket.

He really did have a pervy dream. How did Urahara know about that? 'Of course he doesn't know, moron!', he thought trying to calm down his crazy heartbeat. Ichigo uncovered himself.

"No. It's...it's just that I am tired.' he said and he wasn't really lying. 'So what's the matter?" he asked trying to change the subject.

"Well, Soul Society wants you back. But not now. Tomorrow. That's why today I want you to patrol around. Say, did anything weird happen lately?" Kisuke said with a curious gaze in his eyes, showing that he was finally serious.  
If anything weird happened? Hell, yes! Everything was weird! Ichigo nodded then sighed.

"Yesterday the shadow came in my room. I was half asleep, and he entered through the window." Ichigo said with a distressed look on his face then he stopped. He wasn't sure whether to tell Urahara about the perverted part, but he did in the end.

"I see." the man said with a solemn voice. "That shadow. You said it was a males' one? Is the same as that one you saw in park a few days ago?"

"Yeah. That's true. Who do you think it is? Is someone Aizen sent?" Ichigo said with a worried look.

"There's no doubt he is someone Aizen sent. But why did the shadow let you go? Why didn't he take you with him while you were asleep if he wanted you to come? Maybe because he wanted to show us that he can do it anytime or to remind us that they are always watching us. Anyway, tomorrow you will be gone. So all you have to do is to be careful while patrolling." the man said and disappeared.

"How rude" the teen murmured and let a sigh slip.

He was so busy lately, although hollows didn't show up in the past days. Honestly, he preferred the hollows instead of the pervy shadow, but it couldn't be helped.

Ichigo turned in his spiritual form and shunpoed out of the room. It was another sunny day and that almost pissed him. That perfect sunlight, the happy people he saw walking on the clean streets, everything seemed so fake. It pissed him off. A lot.

He stopped in a café where he felt a trace of strange reiatsu. But it was already gone when he entered the café. The orangette sighed and left. So the shadow was following him! Maybe the shadow fell in love with him. Ichigo stopped.

His face was bright red, and he covered his mouth with a trembling hand. What if the person that kissed him on his forehead was actually the shadow? But he was in Soul Society back then. There was no way for the shadow to go there. Still…

The teen had another shocking revelation. It had to be the shadow the one who kissed him. He remembered he felt a vaguely hollow reiatsu. No it wasn't really a hollow. It was a strange reiatsu and resembled a lot the shadow's reiatsu. He really was in deep shit...

His attention was distracted when he saw the new girl in his class walking towards him. At first he thought that she could see him, that she was going to talk to him, but she just passed through him as if he was a ghost. He sighed disappointed. It was true. Normal people couldn't see him in that form. That reminded him how lonely he felt without his friends. Ichigo knew it was the best thing, to keep them safe, but he missed them so much!

He sighed and disappeared.

**"I'm bored. How long are we goin' ta hide?"** a man said with an irritated voice.

**"Just a little longer" **the other said calmly drinking his tea as if nothing happened.

But the man didn't have time to wait. He was sick of it. All he wanted to do was to reveal himself.

**"'m goin"** he said and stood up.

But before he could go the other stopped him by grabbing his arm with force. He looked at him annoyed.

**"Don' try ta stop me!"** he shouted and tried to release his arm.

**"You won't go anywhere until I say otherwise! You won't go to him" **the other hissed.

**"Ya jealous? That's something. If ya want me that bad then I'll stay with ya." **he teased the other who was looking at him with a calm face.

It was a dark night and Ichigo was on his way home when he heard a girl screaming. He searched for her with his eyes narrowed and when he saw her he shunpoed there.

He couldn't see who she was but all Ichigo knew was that the shadow was pointing a katana at her neck. Ichigo didn't think twice and jumped with his Zanpakutou at the shadow. But the shadow stopped him without even looking at him.

**"Useless!"** the shadow said with his calm voice.

The orangette didn't mind him and shunpoed behind the shadow wanting to cut his head off with his big Zanpakutou. But the shadow stopped his Zanpakutou with just one finger before it could even touch his head.

**"I told you it's useless!" **the shadow said.

Then the moon appeared from behind the clouds and lighted the town. Ichigo widened his eyes in shock. The girl he was going to protect was Aoi! That bastard was picking on his friends!

"Bastard!" he said and wanted to attack the shadow again but he stopped him just like before. With only one finger. What the…?

**"You are brainless. I told you it's useless to fight against me. If you want to protect her, then come with me. You don't want your friends to get involved in dangerous stuff, right?"** the shadow said and grabbed Ichigo's Zanpakutou and threw it away before the teen could even react.

The shadow grabbed Ichigo's arms in just one hand, and with the other hand he was pressuring the teen's neck.

**"You understand, don't you? I'm more powerful than you! Give up!"**

"Like I care!" the teen murmured and released himself.

The teen released a part of his reiatsu to search for his Zanpakutou and he found it. But before he could shunpo to it, the shadow was already stabbing him in his stomach.

"What…?" Ichigo said shocked.

**'"You don't seem to understand. I said that you have no chance against me."** the shadow said and took the zanpakutou out of the teen's body. **"It could have been your heart, not your stomach. I don't understand you. You met her yesterday, yet you are ready to give up on your life for her. You sure are stupid."** the shadow said looking at the teen's Zanpakutou.

"So what? She is my friend. And even if she wasn't she is human. She is innocent! Of course I will protect her!" Ichigo said pissed.

**"How will you do that? Your Zanpakutou is here. In my hands."** the shadow said.

"Then all I have to do is to take it from you." the orangette replied.

What happened next happened so fast that he could barely see something. The shadow moved very fast and pushed Ichigo making him falling on the ground. The shadow was staying with one of his feet on the teen's chest with his Zanpakutou pointing at his heart. He stabbed once. But before he could do it twice the Zanpakutou disappeared from his hands. The one who was holding it was the hollowed Ichigo. He transformed fastly in Bankai and started to laugh.

**"Whadda hell, Ichigo? Ya get killed so easy?"** a hoarse voice said.

**"Who are you?"** the shadow asked with a suspicious voice.

**"Me? No one! He didn't give meh a name! He really sucks, doesn't he?"**,he said and let another hysterical laughter slip from his throat.

**"That mask... You... are his hollow, aren't you?** the shadow said and puffed in disgust. "**So...disgusting!" **the shadow added and disappeared.

**"Coward!" ** the hollow said and looked at the girl.

Now he was going to kill her. She was trying to steal his precious strawberry from him. He was prepared to die there for her. How stupid! Why the hell did he act so slow during the battle? The opponent wasn't a big deal. The Hollow looked in the girls' eyes and his eyes widened in surprise. He was pointing Zangetsu to the girls chest but before he could kill her, Ichigo started to remove the mask.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Killing innocent people?" Ichigo shouted with half of his mask on his face.

**"Partner, listen ta me. She ain't what ya think! She is…"** but Ichigo didn't let him end his phrase and removed the mask completely.

He took the girl that fainted and went to her home where he let her. He shunpoed to his home, but he remained on the rooftop and stared at the dark sky the rest of the night, searching for strange reiatsu. He had enough.

Everyone tried to kill his friends because of him. Maybe he should have gone with the shadow. He sighed. He really had enough.


	7. Chapter 6

**Ch. 6  
Refusal**

It was still night, when he decided to go and tell Urahara about what happened. At first this is what he wanted to do. But he changed his mind. Something inside him told him not to go.

He remained on the rooftop for the rest of the night and even after it. He looked at the sky which was changing its colors as the day was coming closer. The sun rose slowly. First it was crimson, then it gradually became orange. After that the sun was so bright that the teen couldn't, of course, look at it. That's how it was supposed to be.

He looked around and sighed. The teen felt a bit relaxed despite all that happened recently. At least today seemed a normal day. The air was fresh, springlike and the sky had some clouds. It finally looked like a normal spring day.

The teen entered his room through the window and transformed in his human form. He stretched his back and went to the bathroom to take a shower. The water was hot and that relaxed him even more. He left the shower with a blue towel around his waist. The teen went to the washbasin and turned on the water. He put some toothpaste on his toothbrush and begun to brush his teeth while looking through the bath's window.

The bath was sunk in sunlight and that gave him a warm feeling. He would have smiled if his mouth wasn't busy with the toothbrush. When he finished brushing his teeth he turned his gaze at the mirror.

The teen stepped back, pointed a finger at the mirror, and let a scream out. His eyes were widened in shock.

"What the…?" he tried to say but he couldn't in the end.

Instead of his reflection, the mirror showed a guy with white hair, super pale skin, gold eyes with black sclera, and with a big grin. It was no one else, but his Hollow, Hichigo, or at least Zangetsu called him that way.

"You...What the hell are you doing here?" Ichigo started to shout at the mirror.

"**Tch. Yer no fun, King! Ya won't listen ta meh if I don' just pop up. 'bout tha' girl ya stopped me 'rom killin' her…"** a hoarse voice said in his head but the hollow within the mirror was moving but made no sound.

"I don't need to listen to you, Hichigo!" the teen said disgusted.

**"Didja just called meh Hichigo? Old Man Zangetsu…Ya'll pay fer tellin' 'im."** the albino hissed. **"Don't ever call me Hichigo again! I hate tha' name."** the albino said with a threatening low voice.

"Whatever." the teen said and turned to leave the bathroom.

**"Tha' girl ain't what ya think she is. Ya should've let me kill 'er. She…"** the albino said with a serious voice while Ichigo was leaving the bathroom.

"I don't want to hear. I can't trust you, you monster! I would be really stupid if I did so. So leave me alone already. I am busy." the teen interrupted him.

**"It's important! Please! She is a…fekuhfuej"** Hichigo said with a desperate voice but the teen interrupted him again. He didn't want to listen to that parasite.

Ichigo returned in his room and sighed. That parasite ruined the mood, the day, everything. What was he babbling about? Aoi was a human being, nothing more.

He threw himself in bed and stared at the clouds. What was wrong with his hollow? He was acting strange. No, he was like that always. Still something felt odd. The orangette never saw that guy serious until that morning. "I guess he is acting. After all, he is only a… hollow…" Ichigo started to think but stopped suddenly. Zangestu said he wasn't a hollow, Ichigo was tempted to think that way too. But then what was he? Could the teen trust him? And those dreams…In the last one he was with a stranger, but in the first he was kissing the hollow.

"Damn it!" Ichigo murmured as he realized that in the last dream the stranger was his hollow.

He remembered the albino's cold body, that furious kiss, the way Hichigo bit his neck, licked the blood with his cold tongue, those cold and strong fingers that were holding his neck. Everything.

And Ichigo's heart started to beat crazier and crazier as he remembered the dream. And more than that he wanted more. Right now. Was _**THAT**_ even possible? He sure was nuts. Did Shinji and others have those problems with their hollows too? Something told him that they didn't.

"I'm tired, that's all" Ichigo talked to himself and gave up on his thoughts. He really was afraid to know what was wrong with him. Deep inside him he knew the answer so well, but his consciousness would accept it. So he pushed those questions away from his mind. He had too many problems without his love affairs.

Ichigo was in Soul Society since yesterday. They wanted him back so he could train more. That's what they told him, at least. He just ended his battle with Toshiro, and he was heading back to his room. He trained almost all day with the captains and vice-captains and he was tired.

The sun was setting slowly, hiding after the mountains and painting the sky with orange. As he was walking to his room, Rukia waved her hand and came near him.

"You did a good job today, Ichigo" she said trying to cheer him up and she wasn't lying.

"Yeah." was all Kurosaki Ichigo could say at that moment.

Rukia went silent. She could see that there was something buzzing him, only if she could ask him…if he wouldanswer her question. That was the problem.

"Ichigo, did something happened while you were in the Human World?" she said it. She just couldn't bear to see him troubled.

Ichigo stopped walking, turned his gaze at her and looked in her eyes for a few minutes. He wasn't sure if he had to tell her. He didn't want to worry her.

"No. Everything is fine." he lied turning his gaze and starting to walk. He couldn't tell her after all.

"Ichigo. Don't lie to me. I know something is wrong. You'll only make me worry more if you hide it, you know." she said with a serious face, and grabbed Ichigo's chin to make him look at her.

He sighed and told her everything, well, almost everything. He couldn't tell her about the perverted dreams he had. That was his problem.

"I see. So you say there's a new girl in town. Is she a Shinigami?" Rukia asked.

"No. She is human. Nothing more. But that shadow. He's starting to annoy me. I hope that Aoi-san is ok." Ichigo replied. "It's alright. I will find out who he is and what he wants and I'll defeat him." Ichigo said and entered in his room. 'See you tomorrow, Rukia!" he said and closed the door.

The teen covered himself with a blanket and tried to sleep. And he did fell asleep.

***Meanwhile in a weak lighted café***

**"Tch. He left.**" a shadow said with a pissed voice. "**Now really. This mission's takin' too long."**

**"Shut up. He'll come back. We just have to wait a little longer"** the other shadow said with his calm voice and drank his tea.

**"A little longer, a little longer, my ass! That's all ya say. I'm bored. I want my berry back!"** the other shouted and punched the table.

But before he could say something the calm shadow slap the other's face.

**"OI! What' was tha' for?" **the victim shouted.

**"Shut up, trash! You are annoying.**" the other explained and drank his tea.

They went silent. They were going to wait Kurosaki Ichigo return and finalize their diabolic plan.


	8. Chapter 7

** Ch. 7  
His name is…**

The rain was falling hard on the roof and made him wake up. He opened the door and looked around. The rain was, indeed falling hard, pressing the plants until they touched the ground. There was no wind, and the big rain drops were falling straightly, soaking the ground and transforming it in mud. The air was wet, but Ichigo liked that. He went outside of the room, and took a deep breath to feel that wet air again.

The teen stretched his back and yawned. He slept so well the previous night as if he didn't sleep for ages. Well, you could say that was somehow true.

He was sitting down on the wooden floor of the Japanese porch. In the yard there were a lot of trees, but Ichigo didn't know their name, not that he cared anyway, since the trees had only green leaves. No flowers. It was spring, so they should have flowers, but they didn't. They were just crowding in the yard, filling it with their green presence. Ichigo didn't hate them; it was just that he wasn't interested in them since they were so monotonous.

Ichigo was wearing a green leaf patterned kimono, a strange thing since he thought he couldn't take off his Shinigami clothes. But that wasn't true. If he wasn't going to fight he could change his clothes if he wanted to. He found the kimono when he entered his room. The teen liked it, he felt comfortable with it, and he liked how the green pattern contrasted with his orange hair and chocolate eyes. While he sat there, on the porch, he really felt like he was belonging to that place, since he was fitting there so much in it.

The wind started to blow and the rain changed its direction. Now it was falling diagonally to the left, but it wasn't touching the orangette. He was relaxed, and he thought that he should go to sleep again since no one called for him. But something diverted his attention away.

In the yard there was a big white cherry blossom. The rain wasn't falling hard anymore and the wind was still blowing so some white petals reached the teen. It was the only interesting tree from there, but Ichigo didn't observe it until the petals didn't touch his tanned cheeks delicately. He caught one petal with his fingers and now he was staring at it while it layed in his palm.

"Shirosaki…" he murmured while staring at it. "This will be your name from now on.", he continued with a blank voice.

Ichigo wasn't really realizing what he was saying at first. He said that because he wanted to say it deep down in his soul and he was too relaxed to think before doing it. Even when he realized, there was nothing to do about it anymore. He said it. Even though he felt strange about it, he didn't take his words back.

"Shirosaki…" he murmured once again looking with thoughtful eyes at the white cherry blossom.

He was thinking about the pale hollow, and how much the name was fitting him. Besides the fact that the guy was… well, all white, his name had individuality so Ichigo wasn't hurting the albino's ego. But in the same time he was bonded to him, to the teen, since he had his name Kurosaki.

Black and White. People would normally say that the black one is the bad guy, but it wasn't true always. Darkness didn't mean evil as lightness didn't mean good. In fact, he knew, there was neither evil nor good, but what he wanted to protect the other wanted it destroyed. So he thought about him as a parasite. He was almost fully aware of the fact that Shirosaki wasn't a parasite, but his mind wasn't prepared for the truth. Not yet. He just couldn't face it at that moment. It was too soon.

"Shirosaki", he said it for the third time and his heart started to beat madly.

No, that was no good. Why was his face burning? What was wrong with his pulse? No, there was no way. THAT guy was the _**enemy**_. The hollow wanted him dead, he even said it a while ago, that if he has the chance he'll crush the teen's skull and take over his body.

The boy shook his head as if he tried to shake the strange feelings he had and stood up. It was still morning or at least it seemed so, and he was going to rest a little longer, since he could.

He covered himself with the white blanket and fell asleep in an instant.

"Shirosaki", a voice said coming from far away. "This will be your name from now on.", the voice continued coming closer.

He opened his eyes in an instant and looked around. But there was no one in the white room. He sighed disappointed and thought that maybe he imagined it. Maybe it was only a dream just like before. After all it wasn't the first time. He dreamt that the Shinigami _**kissed**_ him and in another dream he thought that the teen _**accepted**_ his crazy desires. But they were only dreams. When he woke up, there was no one around. And the teen's attitude was unchanged. He was calling him a parasite as he always did.

The albino looked through the window with a disappointed look on his face. He knew he wanted too much, he knew very well **HE** won't accept him. But the albino couldn't help it. He loved him and that was all. No stupid questions like "why?" or "how is this possible?". Those questions were useless. He felt it, that crazy love for the young Shinigami, and he couldn't deny it. They were enemies, like the devil and the angel, like the hunter and his pray. He knew he was the hunter, he knew he could smash the little orange pray a long time ago. But he didn't. Why? He fell for him. He fell from his hell. That was all. It was so simple, yet so complicated.

"Shirosaki…" he heard the voice again coming closer.

The albino was half asleep when he heard it, so he thought he was imagining it again.

**"Will ya shuddap already? Yer annoying."** the albino said with a grumpy voice and hid himself under the silky white sheet.

He was tired of it. What was the point in imagining it since there was no way that would ever happen. His King had no intention to believe in him, even though he wasn't a hollow anymore. But he could change in one, he realized. A hollow was born when a Shinigami didn't come to send the ghost in Soul Society. He realized that he could become a hollow again. And if that happened he, for sure, would kill the Shinigami. There would be no heart, no soul, no love, and no feelings. Only the hole in his chest would remember others that he _**HAD**_ feelings. He would be only a _hollow_.

Hichigo knew it was going to happen, that he had no escape from it. It was his destiny and he hated it. He hated the fact that all his feelings will vanish someday and the only thing that will remain will be his monstrosity. But until that day, he had to protect his King and his hidden feelings. He had to be near the orangette until he turned into a real hollow. He was going to protect the only person he ever loved, the person whom made him change. Ichigo, the orange haired teen, did it. That teen was so innocent, yet so strong. He pushed his miserable desires away, denying them with all his might. He was the opposite of the albino. The albino was that miserable side of Ichigo, the side the teen hated so much. Of course there was no way for Ichigo to love him since he was the one who pushed the hollow away from the very start.

Hichigo's eyes were wet, and burning tears were streaking his cold like ice cheeks. He never cried before and he didn't see his King crying. Not lately, but when he lost his mom he cried. His chest was hurting, threatening to break into pieces. He wanted to shout as loud as he could, to fill that empty world he lived with his despair, to break the silence that dominated in that black and white world, to break the world, to destroy it until there was nothing left. The burning tears were falling on the white sheet, sparkling in the cold moonlight. There was no warmth in his world, only light, but the moonlight doesn't have warmth. Only the sun has.

"Shirosaki", he heard the voice clearly and stopped crying.

He wasn't imagining it! Ichigo called him. He gave him a name! His wet eyes were widened in shock. Did that mean that the teen accepted him? No. He didn't accept him, he only thought that the albino needed a name. And Shirosaki knew that.

He looked disappointed through the window. He was happy that the teen gave him a name, of course, but he was sad because he knew the truth. He knew that the orangette won't accept him. His eyes widened in shock again when he saw that the moon had grown. Now it was half of it looking down on his empty world. His King did it he thought and blushed faintly. Even if he didn't accept him the albino would still love him.

Ichigo was sleeping when Renji came in his room and uncovered the orangette waking him up. The teen glared at the red haired Shinigami and punched his face.

"What was that for?", Renji shouted massaging his nose.

"You woke me up.", the teen said bluntly and shrugged. "Anyway, what do you want?", he said before the Shinigami could say anything.

"I came to tell you not to leave the room until we say otherwise. It's a delicate situation, you know.", Renji said and sighed.

"Eh? For real? Then why the hell did you woke me up? I wasn't going anywhere, you know!", the teen said irritated and turned his back to the red haired Shinigami.

"Tch.", the other replied and left.

That was interesting. They banned him from leaving his room. He was curious so he put his Shinigami clothes and went outside, on the porch, but when he tried to enter in the yard, an invisible barrier stopped him.

"Tch. They don't trust me at all", he said irritated. "Whatever", and he returned in his room.

He covered himself with the fluffy blanket and stared at the ceiling. If he used his mask maybe he could break the barrier, but there was no point in doing that. They wanted him to stay there and he was going to stay.

It was a rainy night, the rain was falling really hard and everything around was soaked. Despite the bad weather and the muddy ground she was running as fast as she could. She was running to save her life so nothing else mattered. The girl was being followed by a man since a while ago. She was in her room when he appeared in her room from nowhere. Scared she went outside through the window since her room was at the ground floor. She was running but she didn't know where. To the police? No. She felt his reiatsu. He wasn't human.

The girl was still running, and she thought she was lucky that she was a good runner, but her luck vanished when she ran into a tall man. He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her against him. She couldn't see anything as if he was a shadow and indeed, he wasn't human, she felt his reiatsu.

**"Don' be afraid! I'll end yer pathetic life fast"**, he said with a satisfied voice.

**"Shut up and do it already. We wasted too much time with her. I have better things to do tonight."**,another man said coming from behind. He was the one who chased her until she bumped into the tall guy.

**"Yer no fun. Whatever."** , the other replied, finished her and they disappeared.

They were in a dark room, after a few minutes, and one of them was drying his hair with a towel while the other made poured some hot tea in a green coup.

It was dark. But he could hear someone shouting. It was the shout of despair. It was so sad that his heart started to hurt. He wanted to run at that person, but he didn't see anything. He didn't even know where that person was. The scream could be heard everywhere, as if the world itself was screaming. Such a heartbreaking scream could tear apart even the happiest person in the world. He wanted to save that person, if only he knew where the stranger was. The teen started to run but there was useless, he couldn't see anything. There was no light in that cold world. The air was icy and his bare soles started to freeze.

But he continued to run. The teen believed that if he continued maybe he would find something. He even bumped into walls for a few times, but he didn't give up. He was going the person who was now crying. He was going to heal the stranger's pain. He was going…

Then he found it. It was a big white room. The moonlight entered through a big window. On a big with white sheets bed, there was sitting someone. He was with his back at the teen and his shoulders where trembling while the person cried and whined. Ichigo made a step and but before he could reach the stranger's bed everything vanished. The person, the place, everything..._**vanished**_.


	9. Chapter 8

******Ch. 8****  
****The insanity within the insane one**

Darkness. Cold air and floor. The wind was hissing through some unseen hole. It sounded scary, but in the same time it was sad. There was so much emptiness... He felt like he was in an abyss, in a place where the sunlight never dared to shine. No, that was wrong. No light ever touched that place. The place was empty, full of sorrow and full of anger. The anger you feel when you shout for help and no one comes. And there was something more. The desire to slaughter everyone, to destroy everything. It was a sneaky feeling. He could feel it, but it wasn't something really obvious, if he denied it he could just live on, but the evil desire would not disappear and one day it would take over him. He knew and he was afraid of it.

He looked around trying to see something, but in vain. Even if he was afraid of that place, he wanted to save it, to give it hope, to change it in a warm place. Then he saw it. It was small, but there was light. A cold moonlight entering a hole, but the wind was still hissing through it. He placed his fingers on the hole and the wall vanished.  
The teen's eyes widened in surprise. It was the same white room he saw before, but on the bed there was no stranger crying. There was his Hollow, Shirosaki Hichigo.

"Shirosaki…?" the teen started to say but he stopped. He didn't really understand what happened.

Shirosaki widened his eyes in surprise too, but only for a second. Then he grinned at the little berry who was staring at him shocked.

"Yo, King! What're ya doin' here? Didja finally decide to pay some attention ta meh? What an honor!" Shirosaki taunted the orangette.

"Where the fuck am I? And what are YOU doing here?" the teen said ignoring the albino who was actually pretty pissed in reality, but he would never admit it.

"I told ya before…this is Mashiro. My territory. It's only natural fer meh ta be here, dontcha think so too?" the albino continued to taunt the little berry with a VERY big grin on his face. "So what're ya doin' here?"

"I don't know." he said bluntly and looked through the big window and saw the moon. "Wasn't this place lightless?" Ichigo turned his gaze to Shirosaki. His eyes were really curious.

The albino didn't reply. It was true, Mashiro _**was**_ a lightless place…but Ichigo changed everything. And now the teen was staying before him, with curious eyes and he looked so damn innocent. That was bad. Hichigo was trying to stay calm. He knew he couldn't jump on Ichigo and kiss him and such. It was out of question. The albino sighed and said.

"Yeah, it was." that was all he could say.

"And why…?" Ichigo said more curious but he stopped. Something told him that the hollow wouldn't tell him the truth, anyway.

"Dunno. Why da ya care, anyway?" the albino replied with a bitter voice.

Shirosaki hated himself. Why the hell did he have to be like that towards Ichigo? Well, he knew the answer of course, but it pissed him off. What he wanted to do was the opposite of what he was actually doing. He just wanted to be nice... to be accepted by his King. But that wasn't going to happen and that made him feel hopeless and angry.

The teen threw himself in the big white bed and made some white feathers float in the cold air. Hichigo's eyes widened in surprise when he saw the Shinigami at only two meters away from him. His heart started to beat crazily in his chest, threatening to break it as he looked at the teen.

"Shiro…" Ichigo murmured with a worried voice.

The albino's heartbeat went even louder, if that was possible. He called him Shiro, not Shirosaki, not Hichigo, not hollow nor parasite. **Shiro.** And his voice was worried. Ichigo was worried about…_**him**_? Damn, his secret was so hard to be kept hidden.

"Shiro, are you alright?" the teen said seeing that the albino wouldn't reply. "Your face is… bright blue…" he continued.

Shit! He was going to notice his secret if he continued being that way. He had to stop thinking about perverted things. How lucky he was, though, that the teen didn't realize the meaning of his hard blue blush.

He turned his back at the teen. He had to calm down.

"I'm fine…" he lied.

"No, you are not!" Ichigo said pissed. "You are hiding something from me! Tell me. What is it?" the teen said firmly.

"It's nothing'…" he said but no one was going to believe him. Not even him.

"Stop lying to me! Goddamit! You are the one who said that I should try to understand you, but how am I supposed to do that if you don't let me do it? I'm not God, you know? I can't guess it" he shouted at the hollow and grabbed his shoulder.

But Shiro didn't say anything. He was really shocked. Ichigo tried to understand him? That was…beyond anything he could ever dream of. "His warm hand is still on my shoulder. His eyes are so serious…he's sexy. His face is too close. **HE** is to close. Dammit, I'm goin' ta lose ma senses and attack 'im", the albino thought. And he told the truth. He was going to lose his self control, a normal thing after all, since he was the embodiment of instinct. What he was doing since he realized he loved the teen was beyond his nature. He knew and he was afraid of it. He didn't want to lose his control and attack the little berry. Or he did want to lose it.

"I think I'm…", he started to say but when he realized he stopped. What the hell was he doing? Confessing? That was too nuts. He was losing his self control, the real self was coming to surface.

"Yeah…?" the teen said when he saw that the albino stopped.

His voice was gentle and curious and his face was totally innocent and too friggin' close! Shiro was losing his self control second by second.

His hand moved fast and grabbed Ichigo's chin pulling his face closer to the albino's face. Shiro grinned like a madman and then he chuckled devilishly. But Ichigo didn't have time to run away. The albino's hand grabbed roughly the teen's lower jaw and pulled his face closer to his. Shiro pressed his lips forcibly against Ichigo's. The teen was absolutely shocked, he barely understood what was happening, so when the albino's tongue was searching for an entry he let it inside his mouth without any resistance. Once entered the cold tongue smashed the hot tongue and then they begun to fight furiously. Hichigo's hand moved on the teen's hair and his fingers were pulling down the orange hair. That made Shiro be on top of Ichigo, but none of them broke the kiss. The albino's hand stopped pulling Ichigo's hair. Shiro's hands were both sneaking under the green kimono the teen wore revealing the teen's tanned chest and Ichigo moaned at the cold touch.

The albino broke the kiss, grinned devilishly at the disappointed teen then he roughly pushed with his cold hand the teen's chest and made him fall in the fluffy bed. He quickly went after the teen and kissed him again. Just like before, Ichigo didn't refuse his cold tongue and their kiss turned into a fight again. Hichi's tongue was moving very roughly, more roughly than it did in the previous kiss and Ichigo was responding pretty well to it. But what they felt was different. While Shiro was very possessive Ichigo was wrapped in pleasure.

Ichigo placed his hands on Shiro's back, pulling him closer to close the gap between them. Then he ripped the albino's white cloth revealing his pale back. Ichigo sunk his nails in Shiro's back and started to moan when Hichi broke the kiss and started to lick his neck.

The orangette looked at the ceiling; white feathers were still floating in the air; the air was cold, the moonlight was entering through the window and lightened the white room; the sheets were silky and…and Shiro's cold tongue was licking his neck, Shiro's cold fingers were fondling his hot chest. He was moaning louder and louder while Shiro's tongue explored his shoulder, then his chest, but there it stopped.

Shiro jumped out of the bed and looked at Ichigo scared. What the hell was he doing? Well, wasn't it obvious? He was savoring his strawberry. He finally crushed his fear of being rejected and kissed him. He was acting like his true self. But why didn't Ichigo pushed him away, why was he disappointed in that moment?

Ichigo's eyes widened in shock and terror. What the fuck was going on? Did he really…? No, no…that wasn't possible, but he was there…

Shiro came to his senses quickly and gave the teen a big demonic grin.

"What's wrong, Ichi-berry? Ya want more? If so, then I guess it can't be helped. After all I'm yer horse." he taunted the confused teen.

Ichigo looked at the shirtless albino with hatred. "So everything that happened was to mock me. He wasn't serious. The idiot…" Ichigo thought being really pissed.

Then he realized the gravity of the situation. He thought that the hollow could be serious, that he could love. That was beyond the normal idiocy a human could ever have. He was totally insane thinking that the hollow could love. That was stupid.

"Shut the fuck up, you pervert!" Ichigo shouted and stood up. "I'm leaving and don't you dare to show yourself before me ever again. Understood?" Ichigo said and finally woke up.


	10. Chapter 9

**Ch. 9**

**Decision**

His eyes opened and he looked around. Ichigo was in his room in Soul Society. "What the hell was that?" he asked himself. The teen was petrified since he didn't understand what happened. Well, he did understand that the Hollow kissed him…the HOLLOW! He did understand that he was making fun of him after all, but what was puzzling Ichigo was something else. Why the hell was so disappointed when the parasite stopped, or why did he think that Hichigo could even have feelings? Of course the parasite couldn't have feelings! What was in his head?

"Why do I want more?" the teen said with a calm voice.

But he did not find out the answer. He just couldn't pull himself together and answer the question. Ichigo was trembling for five minutes already and his heart was beating crazily in his chest.

He touched his lips with trembling fingers and shuddered. There was no mistake. He could feel it… the sensation of being kissed. Except of his Hollow he never kissed someone and no one kissed him. It was his first, for God's sake!  
He had never been this pissed. Indeed, his Hollow finally did it. Hichigo tried, in the past, to annoy him but he never succeed. He tried to kill him, he made fun of him every time they met, he claimed that he'll kill Ichigo and take over his body and kill everyone. But that never worked, actually that made Ichigo hate the hollow more. This time was different, though. Not only that the Hollow stole his first kiss, but he actually made fun of him! The bastard caught him with his guard down.

Why was his face blue at that time anyway? Was he sick? No, he couldn't even GET sick. Whatever the reason was it didn't matter. Maybe the hollow just pretended, maybe that blue…blush or whatever it was, was a trick of Hichigo to divert the teen's attention. Anyway, it worked. Ichigo started to worry about the hollow and the bastard caught the moment and kissed him.

Did he even know that it was the orangette's first kiss? Ichigo wasn't sure of it since hollows were a mystery for everyone. "Maybe he did know." Ichigo thought. "Maybe that's why he did it. Because he knew I will be very pissed if he stole my first kiss!" but he stopped. That wasn't his first kiss. He had his first kiss with… with… Shirosaki, indeed! But the problem was that the hollow didn't force him that time, he was sleeping and…and the teen kissed the HOLLOW! Why the hell did he kiss the parasite? Was he nuts? Was he a pervert?

"I must be a pervert. Lately I'm dreaming only perverted stuff. I'm screwed." Ichigo thought. He was desperate, of course he was! "I have to calm down. That only happened in your mind. He is just trying to push you into a corner and make you go crazy. But that won't happen. I'm smarter than him. I have to be. It's not like he is reading my mind, right? Wait! Maybe he is reading my mind RIGHT NOW, and he is very delighted since he finally pissed me off. Too bad, though, that won't last long, parasite!" Ichigo said with loud voice the last sentence and calmed down.  
He wasn't going to fall for Hichigo's tricks.

The teen continued to stare at the ceiling. It was quiet and he asked himself what were the Shinigami doing. They locked him in that house and they were definitely hiding something from him. He was curious, of course, but he just couldn't pull himself together and break the barrier. And speaking of pulling together, he needed the hollow's powers to do it and he definitely didn't want to face the bastard anymore. If he could he would have killed him in that moment, be he couldn't.

And about secrets…not only the Shinigami were hiding something, but his hollow too. He remembered that, before the bastard kissed him, he had his face blue so the orangette tried to find out what happened. But the albino didn't reply sincerely. He was lying and when Ichigo said that he was hiding something even when Ichigo tried to understand him, the hollow was in shock for a few seconds. Then the albino's gaze changed, it became his normal gaze, the insane one. And he attacked the teen. Not to mention that after he stopped for the second time his face was completely terrified. Was all an act? Maybe. But the face Hichigo had when he stopped for the second and last time, that face was too real to be an act. Not even the best actor in the world could make such a terrified face. What if the hollow had a sane side? He was acting strange lately. He was more distant towards the orangette, he didn't even try to kill him when they were in Mashiro, the parasite's territory. Maybe the hollow was only playing with him, but what if that wasn't the case?

Ichigo didn't know what to think anymore. Could Hichigo have a good side too? Was that even possible? The guy was his opposite, so literally he couldn't. But he knew that in this world anything is possible. He, himself, broke the ice in the past. He wanted to win and he did it in the end. Even if his opponents said that it's useless. He won. Maybe his hollow was afraid of his good side. Wait. His good side was Ichigo.

Was Shirosaki afraid of him? Did he try to mask his fear by mocking him? The truth was that Ichigo feared the Hollow a lot at the beginning and even now he couldn't say that he wasn't at least a bit afraid of him.

"If he is afraid of me, then I bet that he will do everything to hide this fact." Ichigo thought.

But that didn't change too much. Ichigo wanted to kill the hollow. Be it fear or anger, the reason, but he still wanted Shirosaki dead. Ichigo had to admit that the hollow was useful lately, but he still wanted him to disappear. He could not trust the parasite, he would be nuts if he did so.

"What's the truth, Shirosaki? Do you really despise me? Are you afraid of me? Is it hard to be in the second place, locked in somewhere where no light reaches you? Does it hurt? Can you feel? How much do you know about this world? I have so many questions…But I know you'll never answer them honestly and seriously." the teen talked to himself but no one responded, of course. "Isn't it painful… your life? You live in such an empty world. That place is emptier than Hueco Mundo. The air I breathed there, the cold floor, the white walls, the pitch black sky and the icy moon…everything scream to me only one word: "Loneliness". Do you feel lonely in that black and white world? You should be the hollow of distruction, you are, but what's with that lonely place? Is that the result of your heart? Your world has changed. What happened? You used to live in my sunny world, with blue skyscrapers. Do I scare you that much? That's why you ran in that empty place? Or is it that you grew up and created your own world? I guess that's it. Your world has no warmth, no hope, no joy. Just black and white. A big place, a maze with no one there. I'm surprised you have light there. Does this mean that you have a hope? Shiro…will you ever trust me?" Ichigo continued to talk to no one.

He was sad, he really pitied the hollow, he would be like Hichigo too if he were in his place. Maybe he should give him a chance.

"It's sad, to be in his place. Being a parasite isn't simple. Maybe I should be nicer from now on. No. Wait. I can't let my guard down. Maybe that's what he wants. No. He is the parasite and I'll destroy him next time we meet. So no more problems." He said firmly. It was the final decision. He wasn't going to accept the hollow. It was too risky.

Ichigo turned his gaze at the window. Outside it was still raining and he was wondering what were the others doing. He wanted to go out but he didn't want to meet his hollow again. So he continued to stare blankly through the window. He couldn't sleep either. What if he entered in Mashiro again? He had to stay awake.

The rain was falling hard and the time had seemed not to pass anymore, and there was no wind to spread the white petals. On a branch, being hidden by the white petals there were two crows. They let a loud croak slip but they didn't move.


	11. Chapter 10

**Ch. 10**  
**True despair**

White feathers were floating in the cold air falling down just like snowflakes. His eyes were burning being sunk in sorrowful tears. He didn't want to cry, he wasn't weak. He wasn't going to cry, no matter what, no matter how desperate he was. He cried once, but that was enough.

His cold pale fingers caught one feather and he looked through tears at it. He played with it absently while fighting with his tears.

Why the hell did he do that? There was no need to kiss the orangette…No. That was wrong. He knew very well why he did it. It was only natural to lose his self control. Shiro knew it from the very start even though he didn't want to admit it. He thought that if he doesn't think about it maybe it won't happen. But deep inside him he knew. He knew that one day he will attack the Shinigami. It was only a matter of time until he lost his unnatural refrain and released his true self. After all he was a being of instinct. He was the hideous part of Ichigo, the part that he rejected from the very start of his life.

"I'm leaving and don't you dare to show yourself before me ever again. Understood?" those words were still echoing in his head, in his whole black and white world, Ichigo's voice was so full of hatred at that time and the echo was even more full of hate.

That made him explode, burning tears were running down through his pale cheeks. Those words that he reheard again and again, those words that were killing him piece by piece until there was nothing left. Only sorrow, despair and hate. He hated himself so much. Much more than Ichigo did. Maybe not now, but next time he, for sure, will transform into a hollow. No one could destroy him and he knew it, except of one person. The person he loved the most. The only person he loved. Ichigo. He could destroy him without even touching him. He could destroy the albino with only a few words. "I hate you. Don't dare to show yourself before me ever again." Those words hurt more than any cut, more than anything. Shiro has been originally a hollow, but even if he changed nothing disappears completely. He was still a hollow, somehow, a hollow with human emotions. Was he transforming into something more human like than hollow like? Who knew? No one. But it didn't matter. It was going to end soon. He was going to regress into a hollow. And all because he had hollow genes he knew what pain was like more than Ichigo. Because he had human emotions he was more fragile than he should be. And all because his King hated him with all his might.

"Why does it hurt so much? I knew he hates me from the very start. Why…?" he thought while burning rivers were cutting his cheeks.

It hurt. Everything hurt. His cheeks felt like they have been cut with a sword every time a tear left his eye. It hurt even when the tear touched the white sheet. Every tear that fell into the sheet felt like a stab into his heart. It hurt. His heart hurt so much that it could eventually stop beating. His neck hurt like someone strangled him. He was being strangled, not by someone, but by Ichigo's words.

"Why?" he shouted letting outside all his frustration, his sorrow, his despair. "Why does it have ta be meh da one who's so in love with his enemy?" he continued to shout. "Why do I have ta love ya so much, Ichi? Why? We are supposed to be enemies…why can't I see ya as an enemy anymore? It would have been more simple if I've never loved ya." He shouted then he stopped. "But tha' would be impossible, right? After all I am who I am. You hate me, but I'm your opposite, so I love you. This and…it's you. It's your fault that I have fallen for you because you are who you are. That's why I love you. While I'm getting weaker you are getting stronger and inversely. This love it's theoretical impossible. Because you are what I am not and I am what you are like the sun and the moon. Because if one of us falls in love, the other would hate. That's why love between us is impossible." Shiro continued with a bitter voice. "It just happened to be me the one who falls in love. That's all. And I'm kind of happy it was me because only thinking about you suffering like I do kills more than half of my heart. No, that idea kills my entire heart, the heart that appeared because of you. Ichigo, you have no idea how much I love you." He said broken.

His tears continued to fall and he was wondering when was he going to stop, when was the pain going to disappear? And after the pain disappeared, what was going to happen to him? Was he going to act like nothing happened? No, of course not. How could he? He knew…he knew that when the pain would have stopped he will lose his heart and become a hollow. No matter how he looked at it he had no escape. He knew very well that if he lost his little sane side he would kill Ichigo. But until that day, he had to protect him.

"Ichigo…" the hollow said broken but no one responded. "Ichigo…" he murmured again and again but no one came, nothing changed in his empty world.

The teen's name was echoing in the albino's ears again and again and it began to hurt. His empty world was craving for love, for light, for warmth. But no one came to save Shirosaki and his world. No matter how many times he shouted the teen's name no one came. No matter how loud he shouted no one heard him.

"ICHIGOO!" he shouted again louder than before if that was possible, making the white walls crumble and the wind go wilder and wilder. His world became instable; the wind was forming a big white sand storm, the walls were shaking. "Ichigo…" he repeated again and again wanting to reach out to his King, but in vain. No one was coming, no one heard him, no one cared about him. Despair. Loneliness. Bitter and painful tears running down his cheeks. He didn't have normal tears anymore. They were bloody, staining the silky white sheet and the white feathers.

"ICHIGO!" he shouted for the last time as loud as he could wishing deep inside him to be saved by the orangette, but his voice didn't reach the shinigami.

If he could he would have shouted until his desperate voice reached the shinigami, but he couldn't. He didn't have time anymore. He put all his power in that scream that no one heard. Everything was in vain. He had been rejected.  
His world was going to crumble…


	12. Chapter 11

**Ch. 11**  
**Chained**

He didn't know how much time must have passed; he might have lost his consciousness for a few times already. He wasn't really sure of it, though. He couldn't see much since he was sunk in darkness. Were was he? He looked around, but in vain. He couldn't see anything.

The floor was cold like ice and he was lying there, too exhausted to stand up and escape that dark place. He sniffed a few times, but he couldn't smell anything. He thought that he could try his luck and shout for help but when he wanted to open his mouth and scream no word left his dried neck. He sighed. Nothing around him had sense. Was it even real? Before this complete darkness he had a few dreams. Were those dreams…or that was the reality? He tried to think about it but no matter how he looked at it he couldn't find a plausible answer. He was just staying there unable to do anything.

What made him open his tired eyes was an orange sun ray. He opened his them quickly and looked around. He was on a river bank, lying in big grass. The sun was setting slowly behind the big city. He knew that place from somewhere, but he couldn't remember. He ruffled his hair and took a deep breath. The air was fresh and everything seemed perfect. He wanted to return to his peaceful sleep, but something caught his attention.

On the other side of the river there was someone. He blinked a few times to see better. On the other side there were two persons. A little boy and his mother. They were searching for something in the big green grass but he couldn't understand what the little boy was looking for. He analyzed all the moves the boy did and thought the he knew that person, but his memory didn't help him. And finally the boy shouted. He found it. What did he find? He couldn't see that far. His mother smiled at him and patted his head. The boy was happy, but the teen that was sitting on the other side felt a bit uneasy.

The teen sighed and threw himself in the grass again. He looked at the cloudless sky and fell asleep…

When he woke up cold rain drops were falling down from the grey sky. He stood up quickly and looked around. He was still there on the river bank, but no one was around.

"I think I've slept too much." He said scratching his wet hair. He wanted to go under a bridge to shelter from the cold rain, but again something caught his attention.

On the other side there was a little girl and a boy who was running after her. It seemed that the little girl wanted to kill herself and the boy was running after her. Then it happened. His mother died trying to protect the little boy. And little girl was only a ghost. The boy was terrified and at first he didn't even understand what exactly happened. He was covered in his mother's blood and rain was falling hard soaking everything.

"Mooom, Mom." The little boy shouted again and again, but his mother didn't respond. She was already dead.

The teen stood on the other side, petrified. The sadness, the despair the little boy had on his face, on his voice, everything made his heart hurt more and more as if it was his mother. The teen stood there, perplexed and hot tears were burning his cold and soaked cheeks.

Then he understood. That little boy was Ichigo and the ghost was actually a hollow. The teen wanted to call the little Ichigo, but his words wouldn't leave his neck. All he could do was to cry and feel the sorrow and despair…

Burning tears were soaking his cheeks. He opened his eyes and saw darkness. But he wasn't lying on the cold floor anymore. His wrists were shackled and he was staying in knees. He felt that his ankles were shackled too. If he weren't that exhausted maybe he would have fought to escape, but he was too tired. He fainted again.

He was running like a desperate in the night, following a dark silhouette. He didn't know why he was running or who the silhouette was. He was running but he didn't know why. The only think he knew was that he had to save someone…but whom? He didn't think about it, he really had to save that someone. He ran following the dark silhouette, they ran together with the moon above them, as if it was watching them.

When they stopped, the teen could see Byakuya, Renji, Ishida and Rukia. The dark silhouette was Ichigo. They started to fight and the teen stood there, but no one observed him, as if he weren't there. Ichigo was strong, but not enough to fight against Byakuya. In the end, the taichou broke Ichigo's huge zanpakutou and cut him. The teen wanted to move, to slaughter the cold hearted captain, but he couldn't. He just couldn't move. But what killed him more was Ichigo's expression when Rukia left.

He was lying there, covered in blood, with his zanpakutou broken and his face was sad. He was sad that he couldn't save Rukia, that he couldn't protect her. His chocolate eyes were so sad that made the petrified teen cry again. He wanted to go near him, to pat his head, then hug him and tell him that everything was going to be okay, that they'll find a way together to bring Rukia back. He wanted to remove the orangette's pain and the sadness that covered his beautiful and powerful chocolate eyes. But he couldn't move and that hurt more than anything, it hurt that all he could do was to stay there and watch Ichigo suffering, dying. Sorrowful tears blurred his eyesight and he fainted again…

He woke up in the dark room again. His head was hurting and tears were still falling down. When was that torture going to end? But what terrified him more than his memories was that the chain was getting shorter and shorter and that made him stand up. When was it going to end? Was he that bad to deserve that kind of punishment? What did he do to deserve it? He couldn't find a reason although he knew he was the bad guy. He was the one that wanted to slaughter, to destroy the whole world. But that wasn't really the case. All he wanted actually was to be accepted by a certain person and the problem was that the orangette wasn't going to accept him.

"Don't dare to show yourself before me ever again" Ichigo's words started to echo in his ears again and again louder and louder. He tried to plug his ears, but Ichigo's voice was shouting in his head. There was no way to stop it.

"Don't…." he thought since his throat was too dried to speak anymore. "Don't hate me, please. Please, Ichigo. Please…" he continued in his mind trying to cover Ichigo's words without an effect, though. "Please…" he repeated again and again in his mind while tears hot like fire were cutting his too wet cheeks. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry, Ichigo! I'm sorry I am evil…" he thought. "Save me from this nightmare. Save me…" he thought while sobbing. His voice seemed to come out from nowhere but his throat was hurting. Even so he couldn't stop his tears. It hurt too much.

"Ichigoo…" he shouted as load as he could with a desperate voice, but no one answered. "Ichigoo…" he forced himself to shout once more but only the echo of his voice answered him. "Save me…" he said broken with his eyes and cheeks wet.

But no one came. No one was there to help him, to stop his suffering. He was completely alone in a dark room, with his wrists and ankles shackled and he could hear the chain crumbling and getting shorter and shorter.

"Ichigo…" he said for the last time but no one came and nothing changed.

He couldn't shout anymore his throat was too dried. It even hurt when he breathed. He was wretched, lonely and exhausted. He remembered Ichigo's expression when they met. Every time they met the orangette was disgusted and scared. Hichigo knew that the teen was afraid of him, he should be. He was a killer after all. He wasn't cured of course. Not completely. He still wanted to destroy the world, to fight until he died, but he didn't want to kill Ichigo. Not anymore. Ichigo was special. He didn't understand why he loved him, how could he even love. He thought he knew but he didn't. It didn't matter, though. It really didn't matter. His problem was that the shinigami hated him.

Hichigo's heart started to ache and he wanted to touch his chest hoping that his heart would stop from aching but the chains were too short. He looked at the ceiling but he didn't see anything. He waited for the pain to stop and he lost the sense of time. His reiatsu was growing more and more trying to release him from the pain. Everything was shaking and after a while three of the walls gave up and fell, the one where he was chained didn't fell. A small moon was showing before him, but it was getting smaller and smaller until it disappeared. He wasn't sunk in complete darkness though, a faint light was around him.

It was his reiatsu that lighted his world. Ichigo's light was gone. Were? He didn't know if the moon truly disappeared or if it got smaller and hid itself behind a cloud. The last version was the most convenient.

He didn't have time to think about it though…an iron stake stabbed his heart and he could fell the chain. His heart was chained too.

Almost sunk in darkness, chained, wretched… His time was running…faster than he thought. And he couldn't do anything to stop it…


	13. Chapter 12

Ch. 12  
Evil Golden Eyes

A strong lightning broke the darkness that engulfed Soul Society and made him squirm in his bed and hug his pillow tighter. A loud thunder followed the lightning breaking the silence of the night. That woke him up instantly. He looked around searching the room with his chocolate eyes, but he could barely see. If he remembered correctly he had a light switch near his bed so he threw himself in bed again and searched for the light switch with his fingers and found it in a few seconds. He pressed it but there was no light. Could Soul Society have electricity problems? He shrugged his shoulders. Normally he would have gone back to his comfortable bed, but he didn't. Something was wrong, though he didn't know what, but something bad was happening or going to happen.

Ichigo opened the door of the room and a strong pale of wind hit him. He left the room and stood up on the porch looking at the sky. It was a dark sky without any star; the wind was blowing wildly bending the trees bend down to the ground. Small lightning was lighting the sky minute by minute, making the sky look a bit purple, but mostly grey.

He wanted to go out of the house and tried to make a step forward but in vain. He was still trapped there, but he didn't have time to fool around. Ichigo knew something bad was going to happen. Why the hell did they seal him, in the first place? What was the meaning of that? He went inside and changed his clothes then grabbed his Zanpakutou and went outside.

"Ban kai!" he said and let his dark reiatsu flow the entire house.

He hit the barrier many times, in different spots, but it was useless. He couldn't destroy it alone, he knew that from the very start but he didn't want to use _**his **_powers, _Shirosaki's_.

"No, I won't use your powers, don't even think about it!" he shouted to make himself sure the hollow heard. "I'll make you disappear from my soul, be sure of that, you filthy hollow. I regret I gave you a name, but, well it's too late. Enjoy it while you can, but your time is running out!" he said and continued to hit the barrier.

Maybe if he hit it countless times it would break, that's what he hoped for. He had to break it that way, he couldn't afford to use the hollow's powers.

***Meanwhile in Mashiro***

A strong lightning was breaking the darkness he had endured. He raised his head tiredly and looked at the black sky. A strong wind started to blow there too. A sand storm started was going to be born and the next thing the albino thought was that he could not escape from it since he was still chained. He struggled desperately to free himself but he couldn't break the chains. His dried neck let out hoarse screams, he sounded like an imprisoned animal. His eyes were burning because of the lightning. He wasn't used to the light anymore, he had fallen that far.

"Ichigo" he thought. "What's happening Ichigo? What are you doing out there? Why is the storm in your head? Who did upset you…?" but he stopped suddenly. "It was me, right? I am at fault…Ichigo, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I caused ya trouble. I should have told ya how I truly feel. But…but I was scared that ya'll reject me. I'm sorry, Ichigo, though I know ya can't hear my voice anymore. I can't hear yers either. I'm sorry…" he thought.

A sand tornado was coming after him and all he could do was too stay there, watch it coming. Cold tears were leaving his inverted eyes. Only two and probably those were going to be his last tears…

***Meanwhile in Soul Society***

Rain started to fall in Soul Society and Ichigo was still trying to break the barrier. He could feel it loosen a bit in some spots, but it wasn't enough. Something was strange. His reiatsu was uncontrollable just like a storm, engulfing everything around him, storming at the barrier, but in vain. They really intended to seal him there. How many days have passed? He didn't know since he collapsed a few times and wondered in his inner world. What were those guys hiding from him? Or were they trying to deceive him? No, they could not be, right? Renji told him to stay put. But why…?

His reiatsu was growing more and more, becoming really dense, making Ichigo feel uneasy. He thought that it was the parasite's fault.

"You think you can use these cheap tricks on me? How stupid of you, Hichigo!" he said full of hatred and continued to hit the invisible barrier with thirst.

He really had no time for stupid games. The orangette knew it was better if he stayed inside as they said, but he couldn't let them eventually sacrifice their lives just to protect him. That was stupid.

***In Mashiro***

He was lying down, being covered by sand. The sand tornado sweep him and the wall, it shook him until he collapsed but he was lucky that he was still alive. His whole body was aching, but what ache more was his heart and his wrists and ankles. He knew without checking it that he still had the stake in his heart.

"If I pull it out…will my heart disappear too?" he thought and tried to touch his bare chest but he was chained. His whole body was. It seemed that no matter where he went the chains would not leave him alone. "It's you, Ichigo, right? Ya are the one who's doin' this ta me…"he thought. "Ya hate me _**that**_ much!" he said and tears left his eyes. "Maybe if I told ya the truth…maybe now it would be different. But I couldn't do that, ya know? I don't get scarred usually, but that's because it is my nature to slaughter. But when it comes to things like love 'n' such…I…I get scared. I'm not used to it. It ain't in my nature, yet I love ya, though I don't know why…"he thought. "There's no escape from here. Ya chained me. Ya are the King of this fucked up world, even though I have my own world…it seems that ya can control it too. I'm all yers, Ichi, and I can't friggin' do anythin'…" he thought but suddenly stopped.

His bleeding heart was aching more and more, he could hear the chain links eating theirselfs and a dangerous power came from inside him. It broke the chains, it pulled him out of the sand and it made everything around him to shake. A strong lightning lighted the black sky, behind him, contouring his silhouette. His pure dark reiatsu was flowing out of him, his clothes were torn, his nails were long and black, his hair was a little longer, but not too much, his wrists were still shackled but the chain was broken. But what was truly terrifying were his eyes. The gold irises were shining in the darkness, but they were evil, cruel and insane.

He grinned devilishly looking at his world. It was sunk in darkness again…

***In Soul Society***

Ichigo was getting tired. The barrier was lightly damaged, no matter how much force he put in his attacks. Outside the wind was blowing madly, threatening to pull up by the root the trees. Ichigo thought that the barrier stopped the wind's power. What if they locked him up just to protect him from the storm? Bullshit. That storm wasn't a natural one, there's no such thing in Soul Society.

"What's wrong, partner?" a hoarse voice in his right ear and Ichigo turned to look, but there was no one. "Scared, King?" the voice taunted the teen then laughed hysterically.

"You…bastard. I thought I told you not to show before me ever again!" Ichigo said looking around him. What if the parasite escaped his mind?

"Well, I ain't there, idiot! I'm in yer head, ya know? So there shouldn't be a problem, right?" he continued.

"You son of a…" Ichigo started to say but Hichigo interrupted him.

"My, my. King, those are filthy words…ya shouldn't use them. Ya may get dirty, too. And we don't want it, now do we?" he continued to taunt the orangette

"Why the hell are you here?" Ichigo said firmly.

"Ta lend ya a hand, ain't it obvious? Ya can't escape without me, ya know very well." He said chuckling.

"And why would you help me? Aren't you my enemy? Just get lost already. I'm tired of your sick games!" Ichigo said.

"Don't be stupid, Ichigo. I got bored in here. Let's seek for some fun. Things that are forbidden are always funny. Don't ya think that way too? Isn't this the reason why ya want to get outta here? Admit it. Ya seek battle. Ya love it!" The hollow shouted the last sentence licking his lips with lust. He really wanted to crush some skulls that night.

"No! That's you, not me! Stop confusing you with me! We are two different persons!" the teen shouted.

"Tch. Idiot, ya still can't see the truth, huh? Well, fine. I guess ya'll see it when it's too late. Anyway, let's get the fuck outta here. I'm bored." He said but this time his voice was a bit disappointed, though Ichigo didn't realize at that moment.

Ichigo gave up since he was already tired and he knew that he couldn't do it alone.

"But I won't let ya use my mask. Noo. And I should tell ya that my powers are hard ta control. So be careful. Ready?" the albino said.

"Ready" Ichigo said and grabbed his bankai tighter.

A powerful reiatsu engulfed the whole house. Ichigo could feel the barrier breaking under the pressure.

"Now!" the hollow shouted and Ichigo hit the barrier with his Bankai.

It broke in invisible pieces, making an uncomfortable sharp sound. Ichigo couldn't see it, but he knew, and he could feel the strange wind. Indeed, that wind wasn't natural. He looked at his palm tired.

He did it…with the enemy's help…


	14. Chapter 13

**Ch. 13**  
**Sunk in blood**

The wind was blowing madly as he ran in the through the darkness, a lot of strong lightning were crushing the dark sky into pieces. He finally escaped the room he was imprisoned for a long time by Soul Society. He didn't do it alone, though.

"Faster, partner" a hoarse voice started to scream in his head. "We hafta go faster!" he continued being excited.

Ichigo didn't argue. He knew he had to go faster for the sake of the others. So he hurried up. Skipping through trees, the wood seemed interminable. Where was everyone? Why couldn't he feel their reiatsu? He couldn't feel it since he was imprisoned in that house but he thought that it was because of the barrier. Wait…did they just hid his reiatsu? It seemed that way. That gave him more reasons to go hurry up.

He went faster and his hollow started to laugh hysterically in his head. He was delighted; of course, he was going to fight, to slaughter. Ichigo knew all that and he thought that if he could he wouldn't let Hichigo fight. He hoped it wasn't anything serious.

The orangette didn't know how much time passed until he got out of the wood nor did his Hollow. But when they reached out the terror began.

In the front of the Pure Soul's Gate was a pile of corpses, shinigami's corpses, ryoka's corpses. Blood was everywhere, sinking Ichigo's white socks, intoxicating the air. Some of the corpses were already rotten. Why didn't their bodies vanish as normal? Ichigo was petrified. Was everyone dead?

But in his inner world, Hichigo, the hollow was licking his lips, grinning devilishly. So what if they were dead? If they died it meant that they were weak. That's how he thought. He couldn't care less, but he liked the view. The trash was dead. And he would have burst into laughter, but something stopped him. Even though he had released himself in his heart there was an iron stake and he couldn't pull it out. His wrists were still shackled but the chain link was broken. He wasn't free. He had a heart, a bleeding one, but he had one so that meant that he still had feelings. Not like before, but he had. He still liked Ichigo and he couldn't let him fall apart.

"King, let's go!" the hollow said with a impetuous voice.

But Ichigo didn't move. What of everyone was dead? Did Rukia also…? No. That was impossible, still. He couldn't even think anymore as if his brain were frozen.

"Let's go, for God's sake! Do ya want ta stay here forever? Maybe they ain't dead. Come on!" Shirosaki started to shout seeing that Ichigo wouldn't move.

"They…they…are dead." He said with a low voice, ignoring his hollow's desperate voice. "Blood…everywhere. Corpses…I-I couldn't protect them." He continued staring blank in the darkness.

He stood like that for a long time, ignoring his hollow, trying to understand what happened. But then it hit him, he realized the gravity of the situation and he fell in his knees, drenching his hakama in blood.

"I'm useless! Why does everyone try to protect me instead of letting me protect them? Am I that useless in their eyes?" he started to shout putting one hand on his chest pressing his aching heart while with the other he was supporting himself by putting it in the sunk in blood ground. "I can't feel their presence…they must be dead. They knew! They knew what was going to happen that's why they locked me up." He continued, burning tears falling his cheeks, while his heart twitched painfully in his chest.

"King, oi, King!" his hollow shouted his head to get his attention but in vain. "Get up, partner!" he continued but no one bothered to listen. His hollow was desperate since he couldn't get his attention. What were they going to do if Ichigo never recovered? What if he killed himself? Normally his hollow would take action but it seemed that he couldn't make himself heard. Nothing changed in the end. He couldn't make himself heard, that meant that his king didn't accept him. The only thing that released Hichigo was his own insanity, his own power. His _**hollow**_ powers. His time was running. Sooner or later he would have lost all his sane side to his insane side, becoming what he truly was. A hollow. His desperate voice wasn't reaching the suffering orangette. Just like that time. He panicked when he realized.

"ICHIGO!" he shouted with tears bluffing his eyesight, with a voice full of despair and anger, his voice echoing in his own black world and his master's voice. "LISTEN TO ME, GODDAMIT!" he continued with an even more desperate voice.

The teen froze, hearing his hollow's desperate voice.

"DON'T FUCKING PANIC OVER NOTHIN'. THEY AIN'T DEAD. CAN'T YA FEEL IT? THEIR PRESENCE?" he said desperately without noticing that Ichigo could actually hear his voice. "They are injured, very injured, but alive. Rukia, Renji, Toshiro, the bald one, the old man. They are still alive. Now stop crying like a sissy girl and move yer ass from here. MOVE! And stop crying already…." He said the last sentence with a pained voice, bursting into tears, and as soon as he understood that Ichigo heard him he vanished, hiding in his soul, in darkness, where Ichigo couldn't hear nor see him crying.

"Oi, Shirosaki!" Ichigo started to shout after the hollow, but no one responded. "Just what was that right now?" he said confused.

_"Were you…were you crying, Shiro?"_ Ichigo thought confused.

"Arigatou!" he said smiling faintly and shunpoed to Soul Society.

The streets were filled with corpses, but he ignored them and hurried up to Yamamoto's desk. He was there, lying on the floor, but breathing.

"O-san." Ichigo said running to the old shinigami who was lying on the floor. He tried to lift him up, but the shinigami opened his eyes, startling the young substitute shinigami.

"Kurosaki Ichigo" the old man whispered. "How did you get out?" he said.

"Forcing it. But that doesn't matter. What happened? Everyone's dead. Why did you lock me up?" Ichigo bombarded the old shinigami with his question.

"You shouldn't have done that. Go to the Technology Bureau and beg people there to transport you to the Real World. Now!" the other said.

"I won't! I can't do that!" the orangette said.

"You shouldn't worry about us. They are still alive, your friends. If you go everything will be alright!" the old man said.

"No!" the teen shouted. He wasn't going to leave his friends.

"It came after you. It was a shadow who did it. We knew before it entered Soul Society that it will come for you. I don't know what you have awaken, boy, but that thing came after your reiatsu. And you can't fight that. Neither could we. We don't know what that is, but it came after you. Go to the real world. I heard that it can't release itself there. Too much pressure. Go, _**now**_! the old man said and closed his eyes.

Before Ichigo could say anything a man from the technical bureau came in, leaning on the wall.

"Go, Kurosaki, go the gate and leave this world." He said.

And Ichigo left the room and went to the gate. He had no choice. The shadow followed him in Soul Society and almost killed everyone. It was his fault in the end. His strong reiatsu caused problems again. When was it going to end? He was tired of creating problems to the others…

The gate opened and he made a step and looked back. Another lightning broke the darkness and he left…


	15. Chapter 14

**Ch. 14**  
**Black and White**

He started to run as fast as he could, wishing for the Cleaner not to appear at that moment. As he continued to run through the dark passage that was connecting Soul Society with Human World he could feel someone's presence. At first he thought that it was some sort of trash that waited to be cleaned by the Cleaner, but the presence started to feel stronger and stronger as if it was approaching him. **_That_** definitely wasn't trash. The reiatsu started to pressure him more and more, suffocating the substitute shinigami who was trying to go to his world. But that wasn't allowed, the being freed more spiritual pressure sending blue waves of reiatsu to the young shinigami who stopped and drew his sword and stayed in defense waiting for his enemy to come to him. The enemy's spiritual pressure started to increase even more as if it was approaching Ichigo who started to run to greet his attacker. Ichigo let his reiatsu flow as well, like a warning to his enemy, saying that if he wanted to fight he would end up dead.

The walls started to shake and the ground as well, the air became hard to be breathed and the shinigami was moving a little slower than before. Just what was that? That spirit force was amazing, suffocating, and then the substitute shinigami could also see some green waves of reiatsu coming to him, surrounding him and suffocating him. Then teen understood. The blue waves only attacked him, somehow destroying the spiritual shield he created to protect his body, but the green waves were heavy, just like an acidic rain, as if its owner was throwing it into him, splashing his unprotected body, suffocating him with that thick spiritual pressure. Ichigo thought that his enemy must be really powerful to do that. If they had to fight it would be a very hard battle. He hoped they wouldn't, though. He hoped…

As he moved forward through the suffocating spiritual pressure he send even more of his reiatsu waves to the enemy trying to show him that he wasn't a weakling either. Seeing that the pressure became even greater he started to take out even more reiatsu from his soul, digging inside his soul for an even greater power. So his hollow appeared in his head, whispering at his ears with a low seductive voice.

"Do ya need me, King?"

No answer. Ichigo didn't want to use _his_ powers, but did he even have a choice against that force alone? He didn't seek an answer for his own question. Was there any point in seeking an answer for a question when he knew it so well? No, it was only a waste of time. He needed that power. However, he didn't reply. He was stubborn enough to do that, even if he really needed Shirosaki's power. It was his pride that stopped him.

"Tch. This is so like you" the hollow said annoyed when he saw that the shinigami didn't respond.

The orangette could be very stubborn and he could refuse and lie just for his pride, but he could not lie _him_. Oh, no. He couldn't lie to him even when he really wanted, that happening all the time, anyway. Shirosaki knew very well that Ichigo was lying, he knew that he was going to lie even before he asked the teen. After all he lived inside his soul all his life so no one knew Ichigo better than him.

"Ya stubborn ass" he said sighing. "Always too proud ta admit ya need me" he continued with a disapproving voice.

"Tch. Yer annoyin'." He said pissed and began to retreat in darkness slowly.

The teen ignored his hollow and continued running. It was harder and harder to run through that thick soul pressure and somehow he regretted for rejecting Shirosaki's help.

When he was almost ready to beg for the hollow's help, he saw it. The source of those deadly waves. It was a dark form, undefined, like a shadow. Ichigo stopped. Was that the shadow that attacked Soul Society, which killed almost everyone? Was that the shadow that followed him in the human world? If it were, then or it got bigger or it could change its form, because now it was huge as if it wasn't only one person anymore. As if it was two…

Ichigo put his sword in defense again, studying the shadow's intentions. The shadow puffed and made relaxed steps towards Ichigo, its form changing at each step, as if the shadow couldn't control half of its body very well. Ichigo tightened his grip mentally preparing himself to use bankai. He normally wouldn't start a fight with bankai but his enemy was a serious deal, it had a lot of power and it almost killed everyone in Soul Society. Ichigo was like an ant for the shadow.

"Ne, Shinigami, didja like what I've done in Soul Society?" the shadow asked stopping at only two steps before Ichigo who started to fume. "From yer eyes I can tell it did not please ya. Whadda shame, though. I went through all the trouble to do it fer ya 'n' ya don't even like it." The shadow said to taunt the teen. "Maybe next time I will kill them. Maybe ya'll like it. Or at least yer hollow will…" the shadow added and used a strange voice for the last sentence knowing that it will annoy the substitute shinigami.

"Wha-what are you talking about?" Ichigo said surprised. How did the shadow know about his hollow, about the way he felt?

"Oh, don't try ta lie. I know 'bout tha' guy, _your _**hollow**. It's useless to hide it. 'n' ya shouldn't be ashamed. He is something. 'n' waaay better than ya" he added and chuckled devilishly just like Hichigo did sometimes.

Ichigo held his sword tighter looking with prudence at the shadow waiting for it make a movement, but the shadow only laughed hysterically.

"Yer so funny, Ichi-berry!" the shadow said and Ichigo's face turned red in anger and embarrassment.

"Don't call me that!" he shouted and hold Zangetsu even tighter if that was possible. He was annoyed beyond the measure.

"'n' why not?" the other asked bluntly as if it didn't know the reason.

"Because I hate nicknames" he said and released his bankai out of anger. "You will regret for what you've done to my friends." He said and attacked the shadow but the shadow stopped him with his bare hand making the teen stare surprised at his sword.

The shadow pulled the sword's edge, snatching it from the teen's hands, blood dripping out of the shadow's hand.

"Sharp thing, ain't it?" he said admiring the sword, turning it in his hand to examine it better while the substitute shinigami stared at him.

What did the shadow just do? Did he or she or whatever it was steal his swords from his hands so _easily_?

"Too bad ya won't use it anymore, shinigami!" he said pointing at the teen with his own blade, with Tensa Zangetsu! "Say yer last prayer, kid, but make it short. I hate prayers." The shadow said still pointing at the orangette with his sword.

What was he going to do now? He had nothing to defense himself. Since when did he become such a weakling? Or was his opponent _that_ powerful?

Since the teen didn't say anything nor do anything the shadow went forward and implanted the black sword in Ichigo's shoulder. The teen caught it with his hand, blood dripping from his shoulder and his hand. He didn't have time to stare into space. He had to do something, but what? He couldn't steal his Zanpakutou from the shadow, he knew.

The shadow drew the sword out of Kurosaki's shoulder cutting the shinigami's palm more and implanted it in the other shoulder letting his crazy laughter out. What a crazy creature he was!

The shadow drew the sword out of Ichigo's shoulder again and grabbed his collar and lifted him up. Ichigo could not see his face, nor silhouette. It was so deformed! One punch in the face. Two. Three. Four. A rain of punches in the face, Ichigo lost their numbers. He looked with a sad look at his Zanpakutou that was lying on the ground. He could not reach it. He called its name in his head over and over again but it won't turn back to him. He just stayed there, lifted up in the air and getting beaten so easily. The shadow was laughing hysterically while it punched him in the face. It hurt. So much that soon he couldn't even feel it anymore.

"Tch." A well-known hoarse voice said in his ear full of disapproval. "See? Now what will ya do? Will ya just die here?" the hollow continued with a disappointed voice. "I told ya countless times, stop bein' so stubborn. Let me fucking help ya already!" he said the last sentence with a frustrated broken voice. "It would cause me problems if ya die, ya know. Stop doin' half-assed jobs! Say, will ya let me lend ya my power?" the hollow said in his ear.

Hichigo…was helping him? Another punch. Lending him his power? Another one. Caused him problems if he died? Yet another punch. H-he was helping him? And another one. Allow the hollow to help him? Another punch. Did he have another option? Could he escape without his help? His hollow was going to help him. Another punch._Again._ His hollow was going to help him. Again! That hurt more like a punch in the face. Another punch. But was he going to die there? Just like that? Being punched in the face until he died? For real? How about saving the world and stuff? His family, his friends, even the strangers. How could he let them suffer just because of his pride? Another one. No. He was not going to let anyone cry because of him. Enough. Another punch. "I said enough!" he thought and the hollow started to grin taking Ichigo's thoughts as an "yes".

The surrounding started to shake and Ichigo could feel Hichigo's power come outside his soul taking over his body. It seemed that the shadow realized that too and it let the shinigami go making a few steps backwards and grabbing Tensa Zangetsu. But Ichigo didn't care. His sclera started to turn black as he moved forward to the shadow. The shadow was backing away from him still pointing at the shinigami with the black sword. Ichigo moved forward with a fierce look his eyes, dark red and black spiritual pressure flowing out from him. The shadow stopped and looked at the shinigami as if it was calculating something, but it didn't last long. It jumped at Ichigo wanting to cut him with Tensa Zangetsu but Ichigo stopped him.

In his hands appeared a white sword, a white Tensa Zangetsu and it stopped the stolen one just in time. The shadow stepped back in surprise but it didn't have time to relax. Ichigo attacked him with the white sword and the shadow could hardly move to parry that. The orangette saw something strange, though, about its body, about its movements. It moved as if it was made from two different pieces which could not move as one, which could not coordinate their movements together. So, a new idea came in his mind.

He stepped back letting the shadow breath one moment, but only one moment and then jumped again, gaining all the power he could find inside him and putting it in the white sword and Hichigo was helping too. He could feel his immense force pouring into that sword. White and black waves of spiritual pressure started to flow from Ichigo and the white blade. When he landed he did it on the strangest spot of the being just where he thought the being was parted in two. And he was right. He caught the shadow in two distinctive forms. Their silhouettes looked human, both males. One of the tall and the other one smaller. From one of them he could see flowing blue reiatsu waves and from the other one he could see the thick green acidic rain like. So they were two, that was why they were so strong. Well, Hichigo was helping him too so he was not alone.

The taller shadow threw the black Tensa Zangetsu at Ichigo's feet and hissed annoyed. The other didn't say anything but nodded and they vanished…


	16. Chapter 15

****

Ch. 15  
Falling…the Clock is ticking.

It was another grey day in KarakuraTown. Big clouds were crowding on the sky that was once blue. It was, most probably, going to rain soon.

Ichigo sighed and looked through the window thinking hard, not about school, how he should have done, but about what happened three days ago. He put in danger Soul Society, they almost died. Who in the world were those two bastards that were after him? Just who? What did they want? Did Aizen really send them? There were so many questions…Yet no certain answers. Rukia paid him a visit the day before to assure him that everyone was ok or at least most of them were. There were those shinigami that died and still didn't vanish, but Kurotsuchi Mayuri said that he'll analyze the situation. She said that they recovered faster than usual, though she didn't know why. And Ichigo thought that it had something to do with the shadow though he didn't know exactly what was it or why he thought so. It was only an assumption.

But that wasn't all. He would have lied if he said so. You see, the orange haired teen was truly troubled. There was that thing with those badasss shadows, but in the same time he had to use **_his_** powers. Since when did that hollow gain that kind of powers? He had a Zanpakutou too, a **_White Tensa Zangetsu_**. Just **_who_** was he?

There was no way a mere hollow could use a Zanpakutou and on top of that his Zanpakutou, more or less. Was he going to transform into an Arrancar? But if so, then he needed Hogyoku to completely transform, right? Or…?

"Aghh!", Ichigo said irritated and ruffled his hair violently his bangs covering his face.

"Ichigo, are you feeling ok?", Aoi asked him with a worried voice, but he shook his head and continued to stare through the window.

The girl didn't ask anything anymore. She knew that Ichigo was a stubborn ass sometimes so she had to bear with it.

The orangette let another sigh slip his mouth. He missed his friends. Now that he mentioned it they were in Soul Society when the shadows attacked. His eyes widened in shock and fear. What if…? No, Rukia would have told him…right? He banged his head loudly against his desk. For a teen he had too many problems.

His classmates turned to look at him and the teacher scolded him.

"Kurosaki-san, I don't know what's wrong with you lately, but I can't have you ruin my classes. Please leave the classroom and return after it's finished. We must discuss.", the teacher taking her glasses off and giving him a serious look.

The teen didn't argue, an unusual thing for him since he always did. He left the room and started to wander the halls, though he was not supposed to do so. Wandering with his mind blank he reached the rooftop. The orangette didn't hesitate and lied down.

The damned teacher was going to call his father, he knew. Ichigo hated it, since he didn't want to get his old man worried. Geez, his life sucked.

"Then why don't ya change it a lil'?", a low voice whispered in his right ear sending shivers down his spine.

Ichigo looked around but there was no one on the rooftop.

"Who's there?", he found himself asking with a shaking voice. He cleared his throat and asked again, this time louder and firmly. "Who's there?"

But no one responded. Ichigo shrugged his shoulders thinking that he might have dreamed and closed his eyes.

"Whoooo's there?", a voice started to say but it seemed so far away. "Whoo's there, lil' berry-ass?", it continued coming closer, but the teen was somehow asleep. "Don't know who it is?", it taunted. "Too bad!", it shouted.

The teen jumped in his feet and looked around him terrified. Just what the hell was going on? Was he nuts? Wait! He knew who was calling him!

"Oh, so ya do **_know_** who's there, don't ya?", the voice whispered again his ear.

"Teme!", the teen said slightly annoyed. "What the hell do you want?", Ichigo hissed disgusted.

But no one responded, again. The orange head shook his head in disapproval. The bastard was playing with him, again! So he lied down one more time, maybe he could get some sleep if the bastard was gone.

He was half asleep when it happened though. At first he wasn't really aware of it but darkness started to surround him little by little. A voice was calling him but he could not see the person who was calling nor he could hear where the voice was coming from. He was just running through darkness again, running without knowing the reason. Was he running because he was scared? Or because he had to save someone? Which was it? Whatever the reason was he did not find out because he tripped and all his running stopped.

He was sitting there on his knees breathing heavily. Then something wet and sticky was imprisoning him there. The orange haired teen struggled, but he was still imprisoned by the mysterious liquid. Then a strong smell of mud hit him. He was stuck in mud and he struggled just like an animal in a cage letting out furious roars. But the mud was swallowing him…little by little and he could not do anything but struggle…in vain.

Blood was mixed with the sticky dirty substance. The smell dizzied him to the point he could barely move. Before he could even think anymore he sunk in it. It swallowed him.

**_"Kill!",_** a voice echoed in his head while he was falling in his abyss, while the smell of blood was suffocating him, while the mud was covering his dark clothes that he used to wear with pride. **_"Destroy!",_** it continued to say. **_"Devour their soul as they are struggling like animals to escape!", the _**voice cooed in his ear, in his head…in his being.

Who was calling?

"Embrace your true nature. Let your feelings fly. Let them spread in the world.", it purred, cold fingers touching softly his neck from behind. "Like **_knifes_**. Throw them in the people's hearts.", it said with a harsh excited voice digging the fingers his neck forcefully dragging the teen down roughly.

The substitute shinigami was falling, his wings broken, falling in that abyss, but he could not rise. He was dirty of mud, of blood…of guilt. As he was falling the other was laughing with a low voice, waiting for the shinigami to fall in his arms. The Shinigami hated that voice, that sadistic laughter.

Where was he?

He didn't have time to find out though. Ichigo has fallen in his arms, in the **_hollow's_** arms. And there was no coming back. Once fallen you'll never return. Or at least not the way you were before…

The countdown had begun…


	17. Chapter 16

Ch. 16  
Dangerous Pleasure

He tried to move his arms, but they were shackled, so were his feet. A cold breeze was touching his bare chest making him shudder. He could not see, he could not move, but he could hear it. He could hear the wind whistling through some unseen hole and he could hear the steps. His capturer was coming… and he couldn't do anything. He was caught like a bird in a deadly cage.

The person was coming closer, his heart was beating faster and faster, his breath hardened. He clenched his teeth and listened carefully, but the steps stopped.

The carrot-top continued to listen, trying to figure out were his capturer was, but he had no luck.

And then, it happened. Sharp teeth sunk in his warm neck, cold fingers hold his throat firmly. He could not move, could not see, but he knew. His capturer was no one else, but the hollow.

Shirosaki sucked his blood slowly, enjoying its taste, its warmth, but he stopped earlier than the teen thought he would. The albino had some other plans with the teen and he wanted the shinigami awake.

So he backed away letting the teen totally confused and he giggled.

"Ne, Ichi, ya liked it?", the hollow teased liking his lips despite the fact that the poor shinigami couldn't see anything since he was blindfolded.

Ichigo tried to tell him that he hated him, but his neck hurt too much and all he could do was to hiss lowly at the overly amused hollow. He did not like it. He did not like it! He did not like it, Goddammit! There was no way he was going to like that…Or at least that's what Ichigo was trying to make himself believe.

But there was no time for lies, Shirosaki felt it in Ichigo's reiatsu. The teen did not like it, he _**loved**_ it! Even if it didn't last long…

But the way the albino's cold lips touched his neck, his sharp teeth perforated his warm skin and then the way he drew the blood out of him. He could feel his neck pulsating violently, his blood running down his chest.

No! He was not going to give up! He had to reject the hollow, to stand strong and to deny his own feelings… He had to _**hate**_ the parasite, not like him…

Shirosaki, however, had some other plans, though. His long fingers reached out for the bondage which was covering the teen's eyes and he ripped it letting Ichigo see.

Chocolate pools met his evil golden eyes which were surrounded by a sea of black. The albino could see hate in them and that pissed him off…It pissed him off so much that he fiercely grabbed the orangette's chin and pressed his lips roughly. Ichigo's eyes widened in surprise since he couldn't understand what was wrong with his hollow.

The albino bit the orangette's lower lip making the teen yelp loudly and that was all the hollow wanted. Now he had the chance to slip his blue tongue in his lover's mouth.

Hichigo positioned himself in the teen's lap who was tied on a chair. His arms were tied with rope and duct tape. Now Shiro's hand was holding his backhead firmly while the other hand was gripping tightly the orange locks as their tongues fought for dominance.

Ichigo closed his eyes refusing to look into Shirosaki's dark ones. Those were the eyes he hated the most, the eyes that made him feel fear whenever he looked at them, yet… He could not keep his brown pools away from them, he had never gotten tired of them. He feared those golden eyes, but he couldn't keep away from them. He opened his eyes slowly and saw the anger behind his lover's eyes. The anger, the pain and the loneliness haunted them.

Shirosaki broke the kiss and closed his eyes. He did not want Ichigo to know his feelings. The orangette didn't have to know that he could feel, no, it was only going to hurt the teen if he did.

"Shirosaki", the teen murmured trying to make the albino look at him."You are hiding something from me, aren't you?", Ichigo said with an indifferent voice, or so it seemed, but Shiro knew, he knew that actually Ichigo was disappointed.

The albino froze. Did Ichigo…? No there was no way he knew the truth. Otherwise he wouldn't be alive, right? Then…?

"What're ya talkin' about, aibou? I ain't hiding any shit, now why would I do tha'?", Shirosaki said with a trembling voice, his heart beating painfully in his chest. What if Ichigo knew the truth?

"I don't know why, Shirosaki, you should tell me the reason. But don't play dumb, it's not going to work. I know you are hiding something really big. What is it?", Ichigo insisted getting slightly irritated.

"I dunno what're ya talkin' 'bout, King.", he said trying to appear as if he knew nothing.

"Shirosaki…I think I told you to stop fucking lying to me! Why do you always make things so complicated? Why can't you tell me the truth?", Ichigo shouted frustrated.

Shiro eyes widened. So this were Ichigo's true colours? Did he actually care for him?

_-Flashback-_

The orange head was laying covered blood on the marble floor. The albino was staring at him. It was true that he called him… it was true, yet he couldn't believe that the teen actually came, that the teen finally listened.  


_ After staring at the teen for a few minutes a brilliant idea hit him. What if he drugged the teen? What if Ichigo was hiding something from him too? Shirosaki's eyes glowed. He was going to give the teen "the truth potion" how he liked to call the drug. He grinned, he was going to have some fun…_

-End of the flashback-

Whether Ichigo cared for him or not, it didn't matter. He simply shoved those thoughts away. The albino was tired of hoping that Ichigo could accept him. He had already understood the message, that he was not wanted, that in Ichigo's eyes he was a monster, a parasite.

"Curious, aren't we?", Shirosaki purred in Ichigo's ear making him shudder slightly. _Even when he's drugged he still refuses to show me some real emotion. What a stubborn ass!_ Shiro thought.

Shirosaki nibbled Ichigo's earlobe while he dug his black nails slowly in the tanned back. Meanwhile the orangette was biting his lips harshly trying not to give out any sound. Seeing this, Shirosaki, who was actually annoyed started to suck his ear lobe slowly while he expired hot air in the teen's ear.

"Mmmm~.", the teen murmured unable to repress his moaning anymore.

Satisfied, Shirosaki left the earlobe alone and moved his attention to the teen's neck. He pressed his cold lips on the tanned skin then bit again making Ichigo's blood squirt in his mouth. He sucked it for a few seconds then released the teen to look at him.

Ichigo was panting heavily while the red liquid was trickling down his chest quickly. The albino moved his gaze to Ichigo brown pools which were one of the best things Hichigo saw. Those chocolate eyes which were usually full of hatred were now filled with a mysterious passion, with _**lust**_.

Hichigo grinned and brushed the tanned chest with his pale fingers. Then he leaned down to Ichigo's chest and licked the blood that covered his skin. He was going to clean him. Oh yeah…

Meanwhile Ichigo was breathing faster and faster moaning every time he felt Shirosaki's cold tongue touch him. That was so wrong…that was so wrong…was so wrong…was so…so…

The cold blue tongue touched his nipple.

It was so…RIGHT!

Pale fingers grabbed his nipple squishing it. Cold mouth sucked his other nipple.

Oh yeah. It felt so DAMN right!

"Mmmmnn~. Sh-shiro!", Ichigo said it with a low pained voice trying to unleash his hands but in vain. Oh, and how much he wanted to grab Shiro's hair, to touch that cold skin…

Staying in Ichigo's lap with his legs wrapped around the chair they sat on, Shirosaki could feel Ichigo's erection growing under him. He gave the teen a feral grin, showing his white and sharp teeth. Ichigo's brown pools widened. Pale fingers stroked the tanned abdomen going down… down. They stopped when they reached the erect member.

Shirosaki's grin grew wider as he massaged Ichigo's clothed erection.

"Sh-Shirosaki…Nghnn…S-stop!", the teen murmured closing his eyes.

"Aww, King, but why should I do tha'? Ya **love** it 'n' don't try ta deny it, I ain't blind, ya know.", the albino purred in his ear, then nibbled his earlobe.

Ichigo bit his lower lip trying to suppress his moans. He felt weird. There was no other word that could describe the way he felt when the albino touched him. He should be rejecting his cold touches, he should be screaming at him to stop, he could have escaped. Yet he didn't do any of this. "Why?" was the question that hunted a part of his mind. Well, he couldn't give himself an answer. He felt so dizzy while the cold fingers explored his skin, so roughly, yet so carefully. Every touch from the hollow made him dizzier and dizzier, as if that icy and rough touch was some sort of a drug.

Black nails were scratching his bare chest while the other hand sneaked under the black cloth the teen wore. The pale hand revealed his erect member and the teen shuddered as the cold air hit him. Everything in that world was so cold, yet he got hotter and hotter. The pale male smirked at him just like a beast then bent down over his shaft and licked its full length while his other hand travelled down the teen's chest, leaving red marks on the sun-kissed skin.

Meanwhile the orange-head was looking at the white ceiling, his mocha pools filled with lust. He was loosing his sane side so quick, just as if he was drugged. Well he was…just that he didn't know that. Not only by the actual drug that Shirosaki has slipped him while he was unconscious and he had no idea about it, but the albino himself was a drug. Those pale and lifeless and long fingers touched him in such a manner.

**_It was intoxicating._**

Shirosaki was nibbling his head slowly, with his eyes closed while with his hands was massaging his leg.

"Oh, Sh-Shiro!", the teen let out a cry, unable to maintain it anymore. It felt so good!

Hichigo smirked satisfied then took half of the teen's member in his icy mouth and sucked **hard**. Ichigo gasped and tried to move his hands. Oh, how he wanted to grip that white hair, to pull the albino closer to him, closer until they suffocated with each other's presence.

Hearing the orange-head moaning freely, without restrain, the albino got excited and he took the hole length in his mouth and started to bob his head.

"Aaah..ah..ah! Shi-SHIRO!", the teen said with a voice full of lust. Oh, dear Lord, it felt so good!

The albino continued to do his job more eager as the teen beneath him shuddered and moaned in pleasure. A sight which he thought he will never see. Yet…

"Shiro…I-I'm cumming!", the teen said with a pained yet pleasured voice and he came, white seed invading Hichi's cold mouth and he swallowed it. All.

Shirosaki moved his pale hands with his long fingers up, slowly touching his King's chest. Golden pools looked fascinated at the Master. His Master.

Ichigo was panting and he had his face so red that he really looked like a strawberry. Shiro found it amusing yet, in the same time, sexy and arousing. He had never thought a day like that was coming. A day when he could see his strong King weak, embarrassed and damn cute. His chocolate pools were flooded with lust, with need. He so needed the hollow, his every touch. And Shirosaki saw that. A wild, very wild grin appeared on his white face while he stood up never moving his gaze from the teen.

Pale lips touched the pink ones bringing them in a forceful kiss and this time Ichigo didn't even bother to resist it. It was useless to fight his desires.

_**Unknown**_

Yes. The feeling was so unknown to the orange haired teen. Yet he couldn't deny it. His heart was beating fast as Hichigo licked his lips asking for permission. Ichigo gave up instantly.

**_Dangerous._**

Oh, yes. His heart flinched in his chest as the not-so-cold-anymore-but-still-cold tongue wrapped around his. Such a dangerous game he was playing. He knew, Ichigo knew that it was dangerous to trust his hollow, yet there he was, so vulnerable in his hollow's arms, in his cold and strong hold.

**_Desires._**

His body was begging for more. His mind was dead and his heart a total mess. He wanted Shirosaki and he wanted him **now**!

But before he could even beg for more, everything started to fade away. Shirosaki's eyes widened in surprise at first and then they were filled with anger. Someone, some bitch from the outside world, tried to snatch his King away from him. And no one steals what is his. No one.

Yet it was too late. Ichigo woke up from the hollow's world and looked around. In front of him was staying his teacher glaring at him.

Oh shit…


	18. Chapter 17

Ch. 17  
Caught

Cold fingers were touching his neck softly, moving slowly to his chest. He hummed satisfied against the touch. Soft kisses were covering his bare stomach. It tickled. A harsh cold breeze hit his body and the gentle touches vanished. He shivered both in disappointment and pleasure. Mocha eyes opened and searched around curiously.

Ichigo ran his hand through his spiky hair and sighed. He had had another dream of…**him**. When was this going to stop, anyway? He looked through the window, his eyes half opened. The sky was blue, as it is supposed to be in a fine summer day. There were a few white clouds wandering lazily on the azure sea, sometimes.

The orangette sighed again and stood up to close the window. He stopped in front of it, resting his right part of the body on the glass. A golden leaf was floating in front of him. He reached out for it and grabbed it carefully. Brown pools admired it for a second then he crushed it in his hand. That damned color!

How long has it been since then? Since **he** had last tried to talk to him? Ichigo tried to remember, but it didn't take him too long. A week has past since then, but it felt like ages to Ichigo. Opening his fist he let go of the crushed leaf and closed the window. He took one deep breath and, then, practiced a smile. It was useless sulking, anyway. That guy only considered him as a toy, right? That must have been the truth, right? He couldn't possibly **feel** something for him.

His smile was replaced by a bitter one. _That's how things should be, of course._ he thought and went downstairs for breakfast. After he had his tummy full he returned to his room. It was another Saturday morning and he, again, finished all his homework.

His friends were still in Soul Society, training hard. Oh, how he missed them! Yet he had no choice but wait for them to come back. His old man was gone in the town with some business, while his sister left the house, too. Karin was probably playing football with the boys again and Yuzu surely was spending her time in a park.

Maybe he should train too. He thought about it countless times, yet he still couldn't bring himself to do it. Ichigo knew that, if he tried to train the other might come out as well. He didn't want to face him. Not until that bastard made the first move. The substitute shinigami had talked to Zangetsu to help him keep away his thought from the albino. The Zanpakuto agreed shaking his head in disapproval. Zangetsu knew what Shiro had done to the orangette and he couldn't blame him. Yet he still thought that Ichigo should open his eyes and see the whole truth.

The teen threw himself in bed once again. He replayed that day once again in his mind. The way Hichigo kissed him was harsh, without a doubt, but still…it felt weird, almost as if the hollow actually cared about him, which was not the case, according to the orangette. How far were things going to go if sensei hadn't woken him up that time? Ichigo shook his head in disapproval trying not to think about it. Still he could imagine Shirosaki's seductive face while he attacked him. That mischievous grin of his, those odd yet beautiful eyes and…

His face went bright red and he covered his mouth his hand. Did he just think that guy had beautiful eyes? Did the thought of that wild grin actually turn him on? He sure was nuts. Even so, something inside him didn't stop to nudge him. Ichigo was half aware that he might, actually, feel attracted to the albino. Not that he was going to admit that. Not in a thousand years. No way. Never. How foolish of him.

*Meanwhile in Mashiro*

Shirosaki sat down on the rooftop of his white palace. The sky was black, just like always and the moon was piercing through the thick darkness. It's silver light did not feel warm, nor did the wind. The white sand dunes were always the same. _What an empty world, King._ he thought calmly.

His white figure was standing tall on the top of that monotone, colorless world. He wore no expression as he watched emotionless the sand dunes. Why should he rule such an empty rule when he could have Ichigo's?

Pale lips curled in a bitter smile and he puffed. Ichigo had forbid him to enter his world. He had probably asked Zangetsu to lock him in Mashiro. _Maybe I shouldn't have done tha'. Now he hates meh, dammit!_ He scratched his head as if it helped him to find a proper answer, yet nothing came out. _Bullshit. It's not like I could've avoided him ferever. I only wished he could…He could what? Love someone like meh? Am I an idiot or what? There's no way fer him ta love someone like meh, a hollow. Yet…Kuso!_he layed on his back and roll on a side.

Love is a painful emotion, so then why feel it? Why bother with it? Fate can be really unfair, right? No one had heard of a hollow to fall for a shinigami. Everyone knew that beings like him had no feelings. Why was he different? Being different is not simple. In fact, it only hurts you. Others can't really understand your feelings, your behavior, to put it simply, you. They can't understand you. Not because they don't want to, but because they've never been through what you've been. It's only natural for them, right?And after all what was the purpose of having such feelings if he could not share them? If he couldn't even reach the teen? Did Ichigo hate him **that** much? Or was it something else?

"Are you sulking again, Hichigo?" a baritone voice echoed in his world.

"Don't call me tha', Old Man. My name's Shiro." he answered annoyed refusing to look at the sky.

"You didn't answer my question." the zanpakuto replied simply. Black and gold eyes looked up to the sky. Zangetsu stood in the air fixing him with a firm gaze. The wind was blowing making his curly hair ruffle at the touch. Beside him the moon was shining pretty bright making his expression hard to read.

"I don't have a choice. King locked meh 'ere. 'N' don't act like ya care. Ya helped him ta do it, didn't ya?" the hollow answered full of anger standing up. He sonidoed to the zanpakuto, so he could see the old man better.

"He asked me to help him. It's not like I can refuse and it's not like you did not deserve it." The man explained gripping his sword self.

"Then why are ya here? Ta make fun of meh? Well, I don't feel like 't, so drop 't." the albino said and turned to leave when Zangetsu stopped him by grabbing his shoulder.

"I'm not done. Of course, I don't agree with your…methods, yet I know your feelings are pure. He has to find out about it too. So I'm letting you enter his mind." He stated and before Shirosaki could do anything he drew out his sword self and planted it in the hollow's chest.

Shirosaki entered the young shinigami's world. Heavy water droplets hit his body as he looked around. He narrowed his eyes and scanned the King's world. His tall skyscrapers were no longer blue, but grey. Shirosaki was staying horizontally on a building just how he was supposed to in the orangette's world. The only thing that really bothered him was the amount of water under him. How long has it been raining in his world? What made Ichigo upset? Was it him?

"It has been raining all week. Day and night, night and day, and so on. You have to fix him or else we are going to sink." Zangetsu stated staying on a pole, just like usual. "You must calm him down, Shiro. I tried to do it, but he won't listen to me. Maybe, you…" Zangetsu's words died in the rain.

The albino nodded and looked around once more. Beside the rain the could feel Ichigo's reiatsu falling with the water droplets.  
_That idiot. First, he locks me up then he sulks. Hafta teach him a lesson._He sonidoed through the heavy rain, trying to reach the dark grey sky. He was going to escape his mind and teach that bastard a lesson.

Shirosaki didn't need to force himself too much to get out of his mind and come to the real albino stood next to the sleeping shinigami. Shirosaki had to admit that Ichigo looked softer when he was sleeping. His usual scowl was nowhere to be found and the hollow found that really cute.

Ichigo moved in his sleep, turning his face to the albino. Shiro jumped out of the bed, even though the orangette was still asleep. Then, an idea stroke him. He should hide himself for a while and spy on Ichigo. Who knows what he may discover. So he hid in the dresser hoping that the midget wouldn't come by that day. Oh, how he hated that Rukia chick. And he would have been ok if she didn't have a thing for Ichigo.

After an hour the orangette woke up from an extremely weird dream. Or should we say his usual extremely weird dream, because he had had that dream for over and week already.

"Gah. It's only his damn fault!" he cursed and stood up. He was heading to the bathroom urgently to take care of his…ahem, problem. Yes, Ichigo had another wet dream of a certain someone. Shirosaki almost stopped breathing trying to hear some more details. But Ichigo didn't say anything. In fact he seemed pretty desperate, but Shirosaki couldn't see him since he locked himself in the dresser. He heard the room's door close and the albino knew that Ichigo left the room.

Slowly he opened the dresser's door and got out of there. He searched around and indeed Ichigo left the room. Curious, just like always, he went to the door and put his pale hand on the door knob. He silently opened it and exited the room. Dark eyes searched around, but no one was there. His family seemed to be away and Ichigo…well, he didn't actually know where he was, but the albino knew he hadn't left the house.

He thought he should try his luck by searching at the floor he was. So he slowly walked around as if he were on a very important mission, which was actually true. When he decided he should go and check downstairs he heard it, a rather loud scream coming from a room.

Shirosaki got closer to the door and listened carefully. Another scream. His pale hand grabbed the door knob almost ready to enter the room when…

"SHIROSAKI!" Ichigo screamed in the other and the albino froze. No, he could not believe it. Ichigo didn't know that he could actually get out of his mind. Then… .GOD. His lips curled in a rather wide grin and he returned to Ichigo's room.

Meanwhile, Ichigo was covering himself with a white towel. He checked his appearance in the mirror. Mocha eyes were half opened, glowing in lust while his cheeks were pinkish. What a mess.

He left the bathroom rather relaxed now that he had taken care of his little problem. Tanned fingers pushed his room's door and he made a step just to go back two. Chocolate pools widened in shock and his body refused to actually move.

On his bed, there was laying a pale male with a wild grin. He only wore black skinny jeans and no shirt. His grin grew wider while his black and gold eyes fixed the teen.

"What's up, Ichigo?" the albino said standing up and walking to the frozen orangette. "Surprised ta see meh, heh?" he said stopping in front of Ichigo who was in a total shock. "Nice view, Ichi." He added sweetly in the orangette's ear breathing cold air in his orangette's face went all red and his heart started to shake madly in his chest. He felt his legs go numb as well his head.

"Shiro." he mumbled and closed his eyes. Ichigo was sure he was hallucinating. The albino could not be there. Right?

"Yes, sweetheart?" the other replied in a husky voice.

"How? Why? When?" he managed to say still not believing that the albino was actually there.

"Well, Ichi. Ya locked me up, right? Ya thought tha' was goin' ta actually work, but guess what. It didn't. Do I need ta mention tha' yer world's a total mess? Are ye tryin' ta kill Zangetsu or what?" the hollow said looking at him intensely.

"So it was Old Man Zangetsu who did it. Kuso! Then it means that you really are here and I'm not imagining things again." Ichigo talked more to himself but Shiro couldn't ignore that. For a second he was surprised. Then he smirked.

"Again? Does tha' mean ya missed meh, Ichi? But, Ichi, ya only had ta call my name 'n' I would've come. Ya know tha'." Shirosaki taunted Ichigo who thought his face couldn't get redder.

"Why would I do that, idiot! If-if you didn't want to see me I shouldn't be forcing you." Ichigo snapped. He had lost all his rationality, mind you.

"Ha?" Hichigo jumped a step back surprised. "Ya were the one who locked meh up in the first place, dummy." He replied rather angry.

"If you really wanted to, you would have escaped. I know you. You always do it." Ichigo fought back frowning dangerously.

"I thought you were mad at me and didn't want to see me so I waited for you to let me free." Shirosaki mumbled obviously embarrassed.

"Wait, wait, wait. Does that mean you actually care? Is this a joke, Shirosaki, cuz if it is…" but he didn't finish his phrase. Shirosaki was averting his gaze from Ichigo and reality struck him. "You sure are full of secrets."

"I can say tha' about ya, too. After all, what were ya doin' a while ago, huh, Ichigo? Did ya actually lock yerself in the bathroom ta…?" he didn't get the chance to finish his phrase. He licked his lips and grabbed Ichigo's hand.

Shirosaki was going to teach the orangette a lesson.


End file.
